Shut Up, Dude: The 50 Best Comments Of 2012

By Scott Lapatine / December 31, 2012 - 11:26 am

As 2012 comes to a close, it’s once again time to take a look back at the the past twelve months in comments. Tomorrow will be this site’s 11th birthday and we could not have lasted this long without you. And Lana Del Rey. Without quick-witted and hot-headed responses to our posts, things around here would be pretty dull and filled with typos. Keep ‘em coming. You can start after reading these 50 highest ranked comments of the year…

#50 bluebear | Oct 1st Score:54

“Edward is a second cousin on his father’s side to Ed Droste”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Droste

It is totally unreasonable to assume that he receives financial support from extended family, let alone want to be dependent on them.

Quit being a jerk.

Posted in: Grizzly Bear Are Not Rich
#49 wesz_rosen | Aug 24th Score:54

Any time I see the word “hipster” used as baseless derision, it makes me want to write a thesis paper on how the word doesn’t mean anything anymore and how it’s just a catch-all for something you don’t like.

Seasame Street is hipster.

Posted in: LA Weekly‘s 20 Worst Hipster Bands
#48 Dr. Feelgood | Aug 8th Score:54

There are literally hundreds (thousands?) of people on this earth. I’m sure it’ll happen.

Posted in: New Beck Album Song Reader Only Available As Sheet Music
#47 djfreshié | Feb 22nd Score:54

seriously WTF now i have to delete all my Mozart Symphonies because i didn’t know he was a FAT FUCKING SELLOUT FOR THE AUSTRIAN EMPEROR

Posted in: Gorillaz – “DoYaThang” (Feat. James Murphy & Andre 3000)
#46

Matt Packman | Dec 18th Score:55

i really love stereogum. and list season. so I uploaded these : https://www.dropbox.com/sh/21m95eirt6jfpgl/eGFxL0yN-G – merry listmas guys xox

Posted in: Pitchfork’s Top 100 Tracks Of 2012
#45

Sam Nabors | Nov 1st Score:55

No Corban, Taylor Swift isn’t going to go out with you.

Posted in: Deconstructing: Taylor Swift, Kendrick Lamar, Soundscan & The Future Of The Album
#44 trinity firearms | Oct 1st Score:55

the moral of the story is pay for any music you enjoy.

Posted in: Grizzly Bear Are Not Rich
#43 thomasbrownester | Sep 20th Score:55

Hey?

Posted in: Pixies’ 10 Best Songs
#42

Corey Minagh | Jul 2nd Score:55

Why the hell did I decide to check my Twitter page when I was out?!

Posted in: Christopher Owens Quits Girls
#41 outrowithbees | Jun 7th Score:55

“I want to see the final edit of the video of my sister spanking her ass in a tub full of glitter, blood and semen-substitutes JUST IN CASE IT LOOKS WEIRD!”

Posted in: Erykah Badu Is Not Happy With Wayne Coyne
#40 Tommy | Aug 28th Score:56

Corban, I think you’re missing something here. I think we’re all missing something here. Maybe we need to accept the possibility of a record so excellent we don’t understand it yet.

(My apologies. I can’t let Stereogum live that line down just yet.)

Posted in: Premature Evaluation: The xx Coexist
#39 Michael_ | Jul 17th Score:57

And if you look off into the distance, you can see the exact shark which Coachella jumped.

Posted in: S.S. Coachella Lineup 2012
#38 lil wayne disciple | May 17th Score:57

What the article left out though is how the hairstyle makes that one eye look, like, so dreamy and deep.

Posted in: Warning: Emo Haircuts May Fuck Up Your Vision
#37 dbr | Mar 21st Score:57

One time Joe Howse realized he was driving 70 on a 65 mph highway, and he immediately slowed down, drove to the nearest police station and asked for a speeding ticket.

Posted in: Premature Evaluation: Beach House Bloom
#36 JaggerT | Feb 5th Score:57

If Lana Del Rey and genocide offend you equally, I think you’re doing it wrong.

Posted in: Watch Bon Iver (And Kristen Wiig’s Lana Del Rey Impersonation) On SNL
#34 mickrandom26 | Oct 5th Score:60
Posted in: Jay-Z Albums From Worst To Best
#33

Griff Fuller Jr. | Jul 4th Score:61

Queer boys of color really need visibility and support, the lack of it is the reason why so many of us are still closeted. I’m hella proud of Frank for having the courage to be out and open and true to himself with no compromise, not even with mainstream success. This is great news. :)

Posted in: Frank Ocean Comes Out
#32

Corey Minagh | Aug 16th Score:62

I Am Trying To Break Your Heart doesn’t even make the top ten!? So long Stereogum, it’s been a blast!

Posted in: Wilco’s 10 Best Songs
#31 Michael_ | Apr 20th Score:62

You were so cute back then, too. Look at that smile…

Posted in: Slanted And Enchanted Turns 20
#30 raptor jesus | Apr 11th Score:62

Moms are soooooo embarrassing amirite?

Posted in: Courtney Love Alleges Dave Grohl Seduced Frances Bean, Tweets A Lot About It
#29

Chris Selden | Jul 2nd Score:63
Posted in: Christopher Owens Quits Girls
#28 sopa middleton | Mar 22nd Score:63

Beach Howse

Posted in: Premature Evaluation: Beach House Bloom
#27

Mischa Smith | Oct 1st Score:64

to me, its not about any of the members personal wealth, it’s about good acts not being able to be compensated for their hard work.

Posted in: Grizzly Bear Are Not Rich
#26 raptor jesus | Jul 4th Score:64

My hearts and prayers are with the Frank Ocean women fans of this world who are now crying in their pillows I’m sure.

Posted in: Frank Ocean Comes Out
#25 wesz_rosen | Jun 14th Score:65

So brave.

Posted in: Let’s Shortlist The Indie Song Of The Summer 2012
#24 diego4533 | May 16th Score:65

“Really? Never seen Seinfeld? The slap bass? Something like puaa-puaa-puaaa-puaaaaa chk ah tn tn tss”

Posted in: Caption Contest: Dirty Projectors Swing Lo Magellan Cover
#23 plb102 | Mar 21st Score:65

Joe Howse: The greatest man alive

Posted in: Premature Evaluation: Beach House Bloom
#22 Corban Goble | Jul 4th Score:66

Frank’s mom:

Posted in: Frank Ocean Comes Out
#20 old man rock | Jul 30th Score:68

The scene in the new Batman movie were 3,000 men are stuck in a cavernous sewer is also about Courthey’s vagina.

Posted in: Courtney Love To Lana Del Rey: “Heart-Shaped Box” Is About My Vagina
#19 djfreshié | Mar 19th Score:68

Or did you mean….this one?

Posted in: In Defense Of Skrillex
#18 djfreshié | Mar 19th Score:69

you mean….this one?!

Posted in: In Defense Of Skrillex
#17

Simon Chapman | Apr 12th Score:70

It’s not really very similar to how I imagine my list would be, but it seems fairly well thought through (especially for NME).

Posted in: NME‘s 100 Best Tracks Of The ’70s
#16 Dr. Feelgood | Sep 20th Score:73

What she needs is a good defense. Probably feeling like a criminal right now.

Posted in: Fiona Apple Arrested For Drug Possession
#15 rubberjohnny0829 | Jul 4th Score:73

lol gay

Posted in: Frank Ocean Comes Out
#14 Rex Manning Day | Oct 25th Score:74

The fact that Pablo Honey was not placed in the top 3 proves that these lists are not designed exclusively as comment-rage bait.

However, the fact that Pablo Honey was not placed last proves that these lists are designed at least partly as comment-rage bait.

Posted in: Radiohead Albums From Worst To Best
#13

Corey Minagh | Oct 25th Score:74

I’ve been looking forward to this one. Nothing makes people lose their shit like a Radiohead list!

Posted in: Radiohead Albums From Worst To Best
#12

Max Del Giudice | Dec 5th Score:80

oh i see her now thanks

Posted in: Stereogum’s Top 50 Albums Of 2012
#11

Ben Cornell | Mar 21st Score:80

one time i had pizza with joe howse. he pretended to be full so i could have the last slice.

Posted in: Premature Evaluation: Beach House Bloom
#10 Dr. Feelgood | Aug 24th Score:82
Posted in: LA Weekly‘s 20 Worst Hipster Bands
#9 crania americana | Mar 6th Score:87

Glad I’m not the only one who thinks “My Sharona” was 56 minutes too short.

Posted in: Bradford Cox Covers “My Sharona” For An Hour In Concert
#8

Josh Reichental | Aug 24th Score:94

Was their criteria ‘good bands that are popular amongst people who like music’? Because that seems to work for most bands on the list.

Posted in: LA Weekly‘s 20 Worst Hipster Bands
#7

Mitch Park | Aug 22nd Score:95

“but we need to accept the possibility of a record so excellent we don’t understand it yet ”

translated:

“once an inevitable critical consensus emerges that this is great, you will all like it, even if it sounds like a mess to you right now”

Posted in: Premature Evaluation: Animal Collective – Centipede Hz
#6 Zayin_451 | Jan 5th Score:96

You misspelled “weakly”.

Posted in: TMZ Details Zooey’s Divorce, Net Worth
#5

Sam Nabors | Jul 4th Score:104

A lot of the homophobia amongst hip-hop fans is being exposed. Not saying they all are, but Waka Flocka tweeted support for Frank last night. And nothing against Waka, but if Waka Flocka Flame’s views are more progressive than yours, you need to re-evaluate your life.

Posted in: Frank Ocean Comes Out
#4 kirt | Nov 29th Score:113

This list is BS, no Fiona Apple?!?

Posted in: The 25 Highest Paid Musicians Of 2012
#3

Kyle Jameson | Aug 24th Score:113

Are they just upset that no one cares about Incubus and 311 anymore?

Posted in: LA Weekly‘s 20 Worst Hipster Bands
#2

Robert Locke | Oct 25th Score:122

Pablo Honey should not be ahead of KOL that is some bullshit.

Posted in: Radiohead Albums From Worst To Best
#1

Alex T Leach | Nov 26th Score:182
Posted in: Paste‘s 50 Best Albums Of 2012