To celebrate the release of Marnie Stern’s upcoming album The Chronicles Of Marnia, Kill Rock Stars will send one lucky dude — sorry ladies, guys only — out on an all-expenses-paid date with Marnie on 3/19, when Chronicles is released. Fellas, if you’ve ever dreamed of sweeping Miss Stern off of her feet or had the chance to participate in her tour kissing booth and still can’t shake the memory, you might be in luck. While “age, religion, and race are not a factor” for entrants, you must be NYC-based. Those without a sense of humor, drug addicts, slackers, and/or vegans need not apply. She’s looking for a homebody who don’t mind having a girlfriend that goes on tours who shares her love of Law & Order: Criminal Intent and petting dogs while eating chicken wings. The winner will be chosen by KRS and Stern’s publicist, so you probably should be extra smooth in your application, especially because you will be asked if you’re willing to relinquish an ex’s email address. Get more information below and if you need advice from a girl about this, ask me in the comments. Please be gentlemen.
Send your answers to the following questionnaire along with a recent photo and your favorite Marnie Sterm song to firstname.lastname@example.org. Don’t be creepy. They will know.
Are you gainfully employed? Elaborate.
When/how long was your last relationship?
What are your hobbies/interests?
What qualities do you most enjoy in a woman?
List any anti-depressants you currently take:
What do you know about Marnie and why do you want to date her?
What would your most recent ex-girlfriend say about you? Can we get her email?
Where would you take Marnie on a first date and why?
The Chronicles Of Marnia is out 3/19 on Kill Rock Stars.