Daft Punk @ The 2013 MTV Video Music Awards

It’s that time of year again, when MTV honors its favorite medium — no, not Catfish — the not-all-but-forgotten music video with the Video Music Awards. This year, a grip of Stereogum artists has been nominated for Moonmen, including Daft Punk, Kendrick Lamar, Drake, Vampire Weekend, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, hell, even Taylor Swift. And while we’ll have to wait until next year to celebrate the five year anniversary of her incident with Kanye, there’s no better way to rile up a Comment Party than by getting just as smashed as he was when he grabbed the mic from a then-still-doe-eyed Swift. Kelly from Videogum and I have created a drinking game to help lube your mind to withstand the broadcast from Brooklyn’s Barclays Center and to add fuel to your finger-fire in the comment section. The last thing I would call you, faithful Stereogum commentariat, is shy, but if you’ve ever felt like you needed a little liquid courage to navigate the minefield, we’ve got you more than covered. The rules are simple and bound to encourage plentiful sips throughout the night. You’re legal drinking age, right?

Drink every time…

  • A ridiculous hashtag appears on-screen.
  • You wonder why there isn’t a host.
  • You see Jared Leto.
  • They announce Justin Timberlake is coming.
  • Kanye West disregards the FCC.
  • Someone says “Brookyn.”
  • There is someone purportedly famous whom you do not recognize at all.
  • Someone doesn’t look excited about Macklemore.
  • You catch Drake looking a little sad.
  • Katy Perry and John Mayer are being gross.
  • You want to tell Lady Gaga to take it easy.
  • A celebrity is singing along with a performer and you can tell that they’ve gotten to a part where they don’t really know the lyrics anymore.
  • An older performer makes a surprise appearance and you can feel that a good percentage of the at-home audience probably can’t identify him/her.

Finish your drink if…

  • One of Daft Punk’s helmets falls off by accident.
  • Taylor Swift doesn’t react well to a Taylor Swift joke.
  • Drake’s outfit is totally acceptable.

Drink all of your and everyone else’s booze if…

  • Taylor Swift steals the mic from Kanye.

Bottoms up! Tune in now and join us in the comments below…

Comments (104)
  1. WHERE IS GRIMES

  2. The show hasn’t even started and Pink already one something for that god awful song. Good start!

  3. It will be awesome in a year or so when they start doin the Catfish awards

  4. I’m not sure who Austin Mahone is, but someone should tell him that if he’s going to lip sync a song he has to actually try and mouth the words.

  5. Finish your drink if… Chris Kirkpatrick has the same haircut as he did in 1999

  6. Damn, Ariana Grande is a tiny little thing

  7. Whoa, Joey Fatone’s dad just also confirmed The Smith’s are reuniting? And he says he’s not done yet? Another announcement within the hour? This is nuts.

  8. Just saw Vampy Weeks on the red carpet.

  9. “Taylor Swift looks like Jenna Elfman” — my wife. My brain just exploded.

  10. Kind of a bitch comment by T-Swift when told she’s the only female up for video of the year “I know I’m really happy about that”

  11. Good god, Lady Gaga is trying way too hard to be artsy

  12. PLEASE DRINK RESPONSIBLY. #brookyln #brookyln #brookyln #brookyln #brookyln #brookyln #brookyln #brookyln

  13. Not sure how to feel about the Tame Impala track playing over Katy Perry walking to her expensive ass trailer…

  14. If you guys feel like you need one more rule, drink every time someone says “twerk.”

    I’m on an iPad. This might be a mess. #pray4claire

  15. WHAT JUST HAPPENED WITH MILEY. Sorry for the Caps but I’m in shock

  16. Is this Miley/Robin/2 Chainz performance ruining surrealism?

  17. JUST DO YR “CONTROL” VERSE, KENDRICK ! ! ! ! ! ! !! !

  18. Kevin Hart is going to make me feel so much better.

  19. This shit is somewhere between an airbrushed SPRING BREAK 2013 shirt your sixteen year old sister brought home from Florida, and a Baz Luhrmann movie.

    Drake sucks too. Don’t get strung along so easily with the pretense.

  20. Kevin Hart has made this show somehow worse.

    Can we just get Kanye up?

  21. Somehow Jared Leto’s introduction made Kanye’s god comparisons actually offensive haha. Anyway I’m the only person who thinks Blood on the leaves is a low point of Yeezus, sorry too much respect for strange fruit and that track is pretty much trash to me with a decent drop.

  22. haha this performance was worth it just to hear that completely blanked out verse. Hmm thought he’d end up going into Black Skinheads though…maybe a second performance?

  23. Breaking Bad is getting real as fuck right now guys

  24. Kanye West: Only person on this show who would even consider putting actual emotion into a performance. Give him that.

    • I’m not sure you can put actual emotion into that song. That point of it is kind of to make a mockery of actual emotion. It samples the arguably the most emotion-stirring song to and puts on top of autotuned lyrics about a stupid as shit analysis of a relationship and it hardly even stays on that topic.

      • Really I thought that was kind of the consensus even to people to like the song. He makes a gritty sexually, emotionally, racially, politically aggressive abum, but Blood on the leaves is his ultimate stance on the ironic contradiction found within most of his music that he prides himself on (and which ever everyone constantly wonders to what extent he is aware of this contradiction); it samples the most obviously politically charged song it raps about completely superficial relationship issues. Some peole like it for that very reason, I think the rolling stone review kind of hinted on that as a plus for the song and the album.

  25. I thought Kanye was good. Better than the ridiculous explosions of “random things = art and entertainment” earlier tonight.

  26. Uhhh, does this mean Daft Punk aren’t performing? WTF?

    • I was wondering the same thing, it really doesn’t seem like it. Who has a kind of surprise artist present before their kind of surprise performance?

  27. Oh well at least we know it’s the Macklemore show now, good for him.

  28. THEY’RE HERE, THEY’RE HERE!

  29. Timberlake’s performance definitely trumps Kanyes (I mean it was staged to be a much grander performance so it makes sense, I just don’t want to hear everyone agreeing Kayne had the best performance.) Poor Joey Fatone being the only person to look like a normal old person. ‘

    • haha J.C. just really needed that last spotlight moment.

    • I think JT’s performance has trumped every VMA performance ever

    • That’s kind of bitter that you just don’t want to hear people say Kanye had the best performance because you don’t like his sampling. He went out and put on a totally different performance compared to the entire over the top portion of this show.

      However, yeah JT has been super fucking entertaining.

      • haha that’s just because you are connecting different points I’ve made. I like Kanye better musically, it wasn’t really anything of a performance to me I guess he put his all into, but to me there wasn’t really anything notable about how he performed what so ever. I do not like Lady gaga’s music, but if i did as much as I liked Kanye’s I don;t know why I would say Kanye’s performance was better.

        • Because I think Kanye actually performed better, it was clear he just decided to throw his idea of a show (which in terms of design was actually a better designed show than anything else on here so far) and just go for it. He clearly isn’t trying to out do anyone, accept I think he stand out by not doing that. That’s why I like him a lot more right now, he scaled back when everyone else is going over the top.

          • I get what your saying and I believe that might usually be the path most successful performances choose to take. The most simple ones can often turn out to be best one, simpleness can emphasize the rawness, the seriousness, and the real basic talent of a performer, among other things. I did not dislike because it was simple, I just thought it wasn’t much of anything, made me think of the song as more like Heartless, one of my least favorite Kanye tracks.

  30. Blood on the Leaves was fucking awesome.

  31. Love how half the audience looks excited and the other half can’t wait to get out of there. It’s like a One Direction concert….or so I am told.

  32. I’m enjoying this, but the real question is, will there be a Luda Day Weekend comment party next week?

  33. HOLY SHIT JUSTIN! Thanks a lot, now I got get money quick just to go to your Rock in Rio concert. That was incredible. And such a class act on his speech. Loved this so much,

  34. Kevin Hart vs. Jimmy Fallon: Battle of the Unfunny Tryhards

  35. It just seems mean when Kevin Hart made fun of N’sync. LEAVE NSYNC ALONE!

  36. Having Vampire Weekend award One Direction with ‘Best Song of the Summer’ seemed kind of cruel

    • That was my favorite moment. Ezra and the drummer presenting the award to their little bros or cousins. They’re classy enough to look good playin second fiddle, but they also didn’t really have a good summer song on the last record.

  37. RIHANNA JUDGING YOU

  38. Macklemore and Sons?

  39. “Hating someone is always wrong.”

    “A$AP Ferg Trap Lord in stores now!”

    LOL

  40. FUCK YEAH! austin mahone all day!

  41. Why did they just cut to Daft Punk? They notoriously give no reaction.

    Because robots.

  42. Drizzy!

  43. I was really hoping theyd zoom out to Drake facing that baby with the fro from the cover. Either a real baby or some kind of hologram would have been equally entertaining.

    • Just a crying baby because it’s way too loud in there for him.

      • It could wear those huge yellow sound canceling headphones that terrible parents put on their babies when they drag them around a 4 day 105 degree music festival…but you’re right that’d kind of run the effect. A crying baby would be kind of artsy.

  44. I turned into the black preacher from When A Fire Starts To Burn when I heard it playing in the background

    *Praises the lord/Disclosure*

  45. So I’m starting to suspect that just had two random dudes put on helmets so that they could promote the video for “Lose Yourself to Dance”. I hope it’s not because Colbert ruined their initial surprise

  46. Stuck on a broken down train right now. Claire, if Kanye steals the mic I’m just gonna break into bar car and raid everything.

  47. I’m just saying I Bruno Mars might o\have just Migueled tis award show. (not the leg dropping thing, the stealing the show at the grammys thing)

  48. “Hi, I’m Brian Fellows!” – Bruno Mars

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