When Jay Z attempted to subliminally diss Drake by calling him “soft as a lacrosse team” on DJ Khaled’s new posse cut “They Don’t Love You No More,” my first thought was that lacrosse is one of the most violent sports imaginable. It’s basically 22 people running around battering each other with sticks. You don’t want to fuck with lax bros.
Unsurprisingly, the upstart professional league Major League Lacrosse took offense at Jay’s comments. In a statement to MTV, an MLL spokesman questioned Jay’s own ability to hang:
Lacrosse is often called the fastest sport on two feet. Players are on the field dodging and shooting balls at over 100 miles per hour. With that said we don’t think Jay Z knows what he’s talking about when he calls lacrosse “soft.” I can guarantee you it is anything but a “soft” sport. Mr. Carter would not last one minute on a lacrosse field during a match and he is more than welcome to come to any of our games and try.
Although it would be entertaining if the nation’s lacrosse players start coming after Jay Nancy-Kerrigan-style, it seems more likely that either this story quickly disappears into the ether or both parties try to extend their moment in the spotlight by actually having Jay participate in a lacrosse match. Either way, Major League Lacrosse gets some good PR, Jay looks like a doofus for about 15 seconds and then goes back to planking on a million, and everybody wins.
[Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images.]