How To Use Body Language To Get Served First At A Bar

By Kelly Conaboy / September 20, 2013

Tip 1: Crouch beneath the bar and wait for your server to approach those standing around where you’re crouching. When he or she asks what they would like, pop up from your position, use your hands to cover the mouths of those standing to your immediate right and left, and shout your order. The bartender can’t ignore you now!
Tip 2: Wave to the bartender — big waves with both arms. Shout “HEY, COME HERE! COME HERE!” Wave him or her over. If he or she is taking his or her time to walk to wherever you’re standing, shout, “GO FASTER!! COME ON!!!!! I NEED TO TALK TO YOU, HEY!!!!!!”
Tip 3: Find out which celebrity is the bartender’s favorite celebrity. Befriend that celebrity. Bring that celebrity to the bar on a night when you know the bartender will be working. Shout, “A DRINK FOR MY FRIEND, [CELEBRITY NAME].” If that doesn’t work I don’t know what to tell you.
Tip 4: Wear a funny mask, stand as close to the bar as you can get, and quickly move your head from right to left, over and over. When the bartender comes over, say, “YOU FORGOT YOUR MASK!” Hand the bartender your mask. Say, “YOU FORGOT THIS.” They won’t know what you’re talking about. Clarify, “YOU FORGOT YOUR MASK, YOU CAN WEAR THIS ONE.” What?! They’ll def give you a drink!

Listen I know we were all having some fun up there, but this video is absolutely perfect and I love all of these “tips” VERY much. Be nice, don’t wave money, and maybe try out being a lunatic. It could work! Thank you, sir! I love you! (Thanks for the tip, Chris Trash!)