Well, we’ve already talked about the Only Movie Trailer That Matters this week, the one for Battlefield America in which little children participate in dance battles and we don’t have any more movies to watch because what’s the point? But there were some other movie trailers this week, perhaps most notably the Looper trailer, not just because people are excited about it and it looks like a fun sci-fi time travel ROMP with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Bruce Willis, but also because there were THREE TEASER TRAILERS this week TEASING THE TEASER TRAILER ITSELF. Woof. The world has changed, I can feel it in the too many teaser trailers. But, so, let’s go:
This looks very good! I liked Rian Johnson’s movie Brick, and I like time travel and adventure. Although I do think it’s funny that when time travel is finally invented in the future, the organized criminals dress like a political cartoon from 1920s Chicago. Kelly said that she can’t believe this is a movie because of Joseph Gordon Levitt’s Bruce Willis face, but the technology is there, Kelly. If we can have photorealistic dinosaurs in Jurassic Park, then we can make Joseph Gordon Levitt look a little bit like Bruce Willis. (Also I don’t actually find it that surprising or dramatic. He mostly just looks like Joseph Gordon Levitt to me? Ugh, Kelly, am I right?)
The Magic of Belle Isle
We don’t have to talk about this one, do we? OK great.
Sure! Fun enough! Greta Gerwig, the guy from The Killing, the guy from that Miranda July movie, the anti-Sex in the City for people who do still secretly love Sex in the City from the studio that brought you (500) Days of Summer: it’s all coming together for you, Brooklyn!
I Know That Voice
Well, but, so, here’s the thing: what do we need the documentary for now? This trailer feels like just about as much as I need of this. Don’t get me wrong: I thought it was a very interesting and enjoyable four minutes! But an hour and a half of this? I’m so sorry! I am busy doing basically anything else!
This looks hilarious! Just kidding. But this looks nice. Two girls erotic journey of self-discovery across Europe or whatever. Great Seinfeld reference, Gabe. Thanks, Gabe!
Finally, OUR generation’s Memento or Pi or something. It’s kind of cheap and lazy to just knee-jerkingly compare every movie to some other movie, and it’s one of the reasons that Hollywood takes fewer and fewer risks, but also it is in black and white and it kind of is like Memento and Pi and also an episode of The Twilight Zone and maybe a Samuel Fuller movie, so whatever. Sue me.
A Fantastic Fear of Everything
Everybody loves Simon Pegg, or at least everybody on the Internet does, and this looks sort of interesting in a 1996-2003 kind of way. The End.