Hey girls! You look nice today. Have you been drinking more water? Do you think I should drink more water? Probably, right? It couldn’t hurt. I always try to get a really big glass and think that that’ll help — having a really big glass of water around all the time. But it’s easy to forget! You know what I mean. Anyway, take a look down at your hands for a second. What do you see? Ten or so fingers? Nail polish, maybe, or the remnants of nail polish? Maybe no nail polish at all? Maybe a ring? That’s all fine, but — and please don’t be embarrassed by this question, I’m not trying to embarrass you — do you know what year it is? I’m just asking because I can tell that none of your rings are robot rings and for me it’s just like, what? Where are you robot rings? Really I’m not trying to be mean, I just honestly do not understand where your robot rings are. Did you leave them at home? Can you go get them?
AT LEAST tell me that this isn’t the first time you’re hearing about robot rings. Please just tell me that. Did you see that they can blink and move their Furby mouth? Ladies? Are you even listening? WHY DO I EVEN TRY? (Via Neatorama.)