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The 2012 Razzie Nominations

Gabe Delahaye | February 27, 2012 - 12:30 pm

The magic and excitement of last night’s Academy Awards has barely faded, and yet already it is time to talk about this year’s Razzie nominations. LOL. Purrrfect. Here’s a thought: can we give all the Razzies TO last night’s Academy Awards? I know it’s kind of pointless and repetitive to complain about the Academy Awards for being a dull and lifeless ceremony dedicated to preening self-congratulation, not to mention the fact that Kelly already did so, but you know what else is pointless and repetitive: the Razzies. LET’S CALL IT A WASH. (Kelly has also already pointed out how good Zach & Will with their cymbals and also the Christopher Guest “focus group” bit were and I do think it’s worth pointing out that contrary to what she said, those things did make a difference because can you imagine the show without them, and yet nevertheless: OOF. I’m not saying it was better last year when James Franco and Anne Hathaway hosted, but I am reminding you that they did that, and how crazy it is that this year didn’t seem that much better actually. Even with all the extra BLACK FACE!)

So, the Razzies. What a great opportunity to complain some more! As someone who has made whining into a cottage industry, you would think I’d be more excited about the Razzies. “Finally, my kind of awards” is what you’d think you’d hear me say. But I don’t like them, actually. It’s supposed to be silly and fun and an elbow to the ribs, but I don’t think it’s any of those things. People still worked hard on all of these movies and wanted them to be good, and it’s fine to laugh about how they turned out, but to simply dismiss all that work with a condescending fake award? Blech. Leave me out of it. Go read a book. This one is good. So is this one.

But whatever. Razzie nominations. Sure. Got it. Here you go:

Worst Picture
Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star
Jack & Jill
New Year’s Eve
Transformers: Dark of the Moon
Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

Worst Actor
Russell Brand, Arthur
Nicolas Cage, Drive Angry 3-D, Season Of The Witch, and Trespass
Taylor Lautner, Abduction and Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I
Adam Sandler, Jack & Jill and Just Go With It
Nick Swardson, Bucky Larson: Born To Be A Star

Worst Actress

Martin Lawrence (As ‘Momma’), Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son
Sarah Palin (As ‘Herself’), Sarah Palin: The Undefeated
Sarah Jessica Parker, I Don’t Know How She Does It and New Year’s Eve
Adam Sandler (As ‘Jill’), Jack & Jill
Kristen Stewart, Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I

Worst Supporting Actress

Katie Holmes, Jack & Jill
Brandon T. Jackson (As “Charmaine”), Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son
Nicole Kidman, Just Go With It
David Spade (As “Monica”), Jack & Jill
The Underwear Model (Aka Rosie Huntington-Whiteley), Transformers: Dark Of The Moon

Worst Supporting Actor
Patrick Dempsey, Transformers: Dark Of The Moon
James Franco, Your Highness
Ken Jeong, Big Momma’s #3, Hangover Part 2, Transformers #3 and Zookeeper
Al Pacino (As ‘Al Pacino’), Jack & Jill
Nick Swardson, Jack & Jill and Just Go With It

Worst Screen Ensemble
The Entire Cast of Bucky Larson: Born To Be A Star
The Entire Cast of Jack & Jill
The Entire Cast of New Year’s Eve
The Entire Cast of Transformers: Dark Of The Moon
The Entire Cast of Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I

Worst Director
Michael Bay, Transformers: Dark Of The Moon
Tom Brady, Bucky Larson: Born To Be A Star
Bill Condon, Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I
Dennis Dugan, Jack & Jill and Just Go With It
Garry Marshall, New Year’s Eve

Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel
Arthur
Bucky Larson: Born To Be A Star

The Hangover Part 2
Jack & Jill
Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I

Worst Screen Couple
Nicolas Cage & Anyone Sharing the Screen with Him in Any of His Three 2011 Movie
Shia Lebeouf & The Underwear Model (Aka Rosie Huntington-Whiteley), Transformers #3
Adam Sandler & EITHER Jennifer Aniston OR Brooklyn Decker, Just Go With It
Adam Sandler & EITHER Katies Holmes, Al Pacino OR Adam Sandler, Jack & Jill
Kristen Stewart & EITHER Taylor Lautner OR Robert Pattinson, Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part I

Worst Screenplay
Bucky Larson: Born To Be A Star, Written by Adam Sandler, Allen Covert and Nick Swardson
Jack & Jill, Screenplay by Steve Koren & Adam Sandler, Story by Ben Zook
New Year’s Eve, Written by Katherine Fugate
Transformers: Dark Of The Moon, Written by Ehren Kruger
Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part I, Screenplay by Melissa Rosenberg, from the novel by Stephenie Meyer

Ewww! All these movies stink! LOLOLOL! Booooooo! (Via DailyMail.)