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Girl Stuff: You Can Get Married When You’re 100!

By Kelly Conaboy / February 21, 2012 - 11:45 am

Hey, ladies. You look great! Your clothes always fit you so well, do you get them tailored? You do? Is that expensive? Not to pry. But it looks like it really makes a difference, and I was wondering if you maybe think I should do it? I don’t have any nice clothes, do you need nice clothes to do it? YOU DO? Well whatever, anyway, as we all know, there is a point in every woman’s life at which she decides whether or not she wants to get married to someone. It might be an answer she was aware of forever — that she always wanted to get married and have someone to rely on for the rest of her life until she was dead or divorced, or that she always wanted to stay single because she was fine by herself and please just leave her alone about it. Or it might be something she decides when she sees a sad movie, or a happy movie. Or reads a sad book? WHO KNOWS? It could be anything. But it is a decision a woman is thought to have to make in relative youth, lest you be OLD and GROSS and UNMARRYABLE. Until THIS LITTLE OLD LADY GOT MARRIED, THAT IS! The world is a new place now. Her name is Dana Jackson and she is 100 years old and she is marrying an 87-year-old named Bill and she is adorable and the best!

You see, ladies? Just wait it out. By the time you’re 100, all of the younger men will be blind and you will look much more adorable in your wedding dress than you would have at any other time if your life anyway. Plus you’ll be super sweet. Life can be beautiful! (Via Dlisted.)