Who Would Have To Be Cast In The Les Miserables Movie To Get You To See It?

By Kelly Conaboy / August 30, 2011

The rumor mill has been off the charts lately with rumors about who is going to be cast in the upcoming movie version of Les Miserables. We’ve all heard them. It’s almost like we’re sick of all the rumors but then it’s like GIVE ME MORE OF THEM, because really we can’t get enough? You know what I mean. The latest rumor is that unstoppable performer Anne Hathaway has been cast as Fantine! From BroadwayWorld.com:

Anne Hathaway was last associated with Les Miserables when she belted out her own version of “Own My Own” at February’s Oscar ceremony to past host Hugh Jackman. Now, BroadwayWorld.com’s reliable sources tell us that at Jackman’s pushing, she is now set to take on the role of Fantine in the eagerly anticipated film version of the epic musical.

To completely switch gears in tone right now: UGH OH COME ON NO THANK YOU ANNE HATHAWAY! There was once a point in my life during which I did not find Anne Hathaway completely insufferable and unbelievable as any character, even the character OF Anne Hathaway, but that point ended a long time ago. And, ugh, THE SINGING. The constant singing and rapping. No thanks, please, I said no thank you. But then again I guess it’s a little silly to be put off by a casting rumor for a Les Miserables movie because that is already an unappealing movie idea, as most* musical-to-movie movie ideas are. Will I get school credit? That’s what I’d like to know. Five extra points on the English final? If we’re not getting school credit I’m NOT GOING. Which brings me to my question: Who would have to be cast in the Les Miserables movie to get it to a point where you would actually maybe want to go?

Now, I don’t really know the roles of Les Miserables by memory and I wish there were a way to look them up but I don’t have a Playbill or anything like that with me right now so these are just suggestions for ANY character that might fit these peoples gender roles.

Britt Daniel from Spoon

I would see the movie version of Les Miserables SO many times if Britt Daniel from Spoon were in it! Wow. I didn’t even think I would have a smart idea in the blog post, and here I am, typing out the SMARTEST idea. Way to start off on a high note great job Kelly you are very good at this.

Aziz Ansari

Oh yeah, I would definitely see this movie if Aziz were in it. Did you guys see the movie he’s in with Jesse Eisenberg? Robbing A Bank? He was very good in that movie! He was very funny. I give him a 10/10 for that movie. I give that movie, though, by itself, if I’m being honest, probably a 6.8/10? Anyway, next.

Ryan Gosling

Duh.

Kelly Conaboy

First of all I know this photo has a watermark on it but it’s the best one of me I could find. Second, it’s not like I WANT to be in this movie, it’s just that I’m not going to not see a movie that I AM in.

Vincent Gallo

I just think he would be good in it.

Chuck Bass

The character Chuck Bass.

Hugh Laurie

I think Hugh Laurie is pretty good, right? Remember when he was Bertie Wooster? That was great. Also I bet he can sing which would be a plus.

Li’l Wayne

The thing I like most about Li’l Wayne is that he is legitimately a crazy person. And for Li’l Wayne’s songs they would all be autotuned and everyone would love it. That is a genius idea. PRINT, GREENLIGHT.

I guess that’s it? No girls. I don’t care about ANY girls other than myself apparently, but if we can get these guys to play all the parts that would be great. Thanks for the tip, Scott!

*With the one exception of the ’70s Jesus Christ Superstar movie which is actually the best movie, that is a fact.