[videoembed size="full_width" alignment="center"][/videoembed] "I'm sorry you had to see her like this. For the most part she's actually a real sweetheart. We usually just keep to ourselves and smoke menthol cigarettes on our mold-infested porch and scream at the neighborhood children. Then we retire to the boudoir and make Michelob Ice-fueled love all night long and into the morning. But ...