Videogum

Jonas Brothers Sex Bomb!

By Gabe Delahaye / June 15, 2009 - 11:53 am

This is great. A bunch of elementary school kids in Brooklyn gathered in the auditorium to watch the Jonas Brothers movie (for education, mostly) and instead they got the Boners Brothers Movie (or some variation on the Boners Brothers). From UPI (via ONTD):

A hardcore pornographic movie was accidentally screened at PS 17 in Brooklyn, N.Y., school officials said.

Students from five classes at the school had assembled to watch “Camp Rock,” a Disney Channel movie starring the Jonas Brothers, but after a teacher powered up the DVD player and walked away to get the Disney movie, a skin flick began to play, the New York Post reported Sunday.

KABOOOM! JONAS BROTHERS SEX BOMB UP INTO YOUR TINY UNSUSPECTING FACE! This must have been really embarrassing for the teachers, to have everyone find out that they were showing their kids the Jonas Brothers movie instead of fucking teaching them anything. They were all out back behind the dumpsters getting ready for two hours of headache-free cigarette smoking and the liberal use of swear words when someone came out and was like “You guys, we goofed,” and they were all like “fuuuuuuck.”

How old were the kids? Were some of them as young as five years old?

The students, some as young as 5-years-old, were exposed to 45-seconds of sex acts in the incident late last month, the newspaper said.

“My son told his friend he saw a naked lady at school,” said Rona Easton, whose 6-year-old son, Cass, viewed the snippet with his kindergarten class. “I thought he was just being silly. It’s appalling.”

Principal Robert Marchi sent home a letter to parents the day of the incident.

“A very explicit pornographic video came on the screen,” Marchi wrote. “This was extremely upsetting to the students and staff members in attendance. … I am deeply sorry that this episode took place at PS 17. I know that we will make every effort to find out who was responsible for this despicable act.”

45 Seconds of Sex Acts is the name of my new album. Man, this story is the best. I really hope that if I am ever a parent I don’t lose sight of how hilarious this is. I’d hate to be one of those parents who’s constantly worried about their child’s well-being and healthy development to the point that I forget what is such a funny and classic mix up.