Breaking News: This Man Will Not Sell You Porn

But he will slit your metal, whatever that means. New York local news station PIX did a story last night on a Queens man whose license plate reads “XXX Pert,” but who claims it’s because of his Expert Metal Slitters business. He says people stop him at red lights and ask him for adult movies. I don’t know why this is news, but I don’t think he’s actually joking when he says he drives around playing porn on his in-car TV:

If only someone in Florida would interview the person with the accidental Ass Orgy license plate, THAT would be news. (Thanks for the tip, Caleb!)