Friday Fight: Who Will The Real World Teach Young People To Tolerate Next?
lindsay: Remember when the token gay person on The Real World was kind of a big deal
lindsay: but on this show it’s like nothing because now there’s a transgendered chick?
gabe: it’s 2008
gabe: i think mtv figured
gabe: if america is ready for a black president
gabe: the real world is ready for katelynn
gabe: i guess it is a big deal? it doesn’t feel like a big deal
gabe: but i think that’s just the been-to-college-live-in-brooklyn in me
lindsay: Well, even the awful Iraq guy who called Katelynn “it” was pretty normal and cool with the gay guy but freaked out by Katelynn.
lindsay: I mean, the OUT gay guy
lindsay: not Chet
lindsay: the cute one
gabe: i want chet to sew me some clothes
gabe: and by sew me some clothes
gabe: i mean be honest with himself
lindsay: would you sing in a boat with chet?
gabe: is that a euphemism?
gabe: i find chet so much more interesting than katelynn
gabe: with his homemade purple sleeveless v-neck sweatshirts
gabe: and his use of the term “metrosexual” as a point of pride
gabe: katelynn just identifies as a woman
gabe: what does chet identify as?
gabe: he’s the real mystery
lindsay: Oh my favorite part of the show
gabe: whoops, sorry, i mean “it’s” the real mystery
lindsay: I can’t remember who it was
lindsay: but a guy calls his girlfriend
lindsay: and tells her that this season is different
gabe: it was ryan
gabe: obviously it was ryan
lindsay: and you can hear in her voice that she thinks it’s just him and 6 girls!
gabe: who else would have a girlfriend?
lindsay: she’s like “um, okayyy”
lindsay: and then she’s relieved. You can hear their entire relationship disintegrate and come back together in that two seconds.
lindsay: So where can they go from here if they want to push the tolerance envelope?
lindsay: They should have a two year old
lindsay: that everyone hates
lindsay: and that they have to potty train
gabe: i want them to have an amputee
gabe: but only because
gabe: i want the “naive” character
gabe: to ask the amputee
gabe: if that’s where they hide the drugs that they deal
gabe: remember that old gem from early real world days?
lindsay: I want them to have an amputee FETISHIST
gabe: that’s going way back
gabe: right, like the people from crash
lindsay: AND an amputee
lindsay: let them fight it out
lindsay: natural tension
gabe: right, but one of them is in a relationship
gabe: long distance
gabe: also “i want them to have an amputee”
gabe: is probably the worst sentence on earth
lindsay: “I want them to make an amputee.” is
gabe: is it just me, or is there something kind of odd about the real world’s insistence that things don’t really start getting real until a gay person is involved
gabe: like, there are lots of different kinds of people in the world
gabe: that we are all probably curious to know better and to understand what it’s like for them to live in today’s world
lindsay: Like they should have a 21 year old guy from Papua New Guinea who has never been out of Papua New Guinea
lindsay: and, like, show him the internet and learn from him and shit
lindsay: show him Wii
lindsay: the whole thing ends with a Wii contest
gabe: that is crazy
gabe: you sound like a burger king ad executive
gabe: what is this, jungle 2 jungle?
gabe: they should follow the real housewives lead
gabe: and just have a black real world
gabe: with one white dude
gabe: like that chappelle show sketch
lindsay: with Christian Finnegan as Chad
lindsay: crying and masturbating
gabe: they should have one celebrity
gabe: in a house of drunk college kids
gabe: that would be incredible
gabe: they should have one celebrity
gabe: and one two year old
gabe: in a house full of black kids
gabe: the end
lindsay: They should have a robot
lindsay: A racist robot.
lindsay: the end.