Totes Amazeballs

Well, here’s a pretty ridiculous story. Tim Burgess, frontman of the early-’90s-vintage Madchester rock band Charlatans UK, was apparently hanging out on Twitter recently and mused that someone should make a cereal called Totes Amazeballs, which is exactly the sort of goofy-ass thing that aging rock stars say on Twitter all the time. And the the people at Kellog’s, who presumably have some understandable lingering affection for “The Only One I Know,” fucked around and made a cereal called Totes Amazeballs.

Adweek got this explanation out of Burgess: “I heard someone use the expression Totes Amazeballs, and it sounded like something from Charlie And The Chocolate Factory. I sent a cheeky tweet saying I’d invented a new cereal and that Kellogg’s were interested. But within an hour they’d got in touch.” Kellog’s designed the cereal, which Adweek calls “a mix of Rocky Road cake, Coco Pops Rocks, marshmallows, shortbread pieces and raisins” (sounds kinda good!), and made exactly one box of it for Burgess. I hope Burgess actually ate the thing and didn’t just hold onto it like some hoarder.

Comments (6)
  1. The name kind of sounds like something I would find in the Kosher section at the supermarket during Passover. The use of “Schhhweet” on the box art only supports my case. Also, for anyone who wanted to know what “squidgy” means, it’s possibly one of the following:

    - Squidgygate refers to the pre-1990 telephone conversations between Diana, Princess of Wales and a close friend, James Gilbey, and to the controversy surrounding how those conversations were recorded. During the calls, Gilbey affectionately called Diana by the names “Squidgy” and “Squidge”. In the conversation, the Princess of Wales likens her situation to that of a character in the popular British soap opera EastEnders, and expresses concern that she might be pregnant.

    - moist and unpleasantly pliant; soggy

  2. They should market this more broadly. It sounds tasty enough that it might bring to the breakfast table all of those people who can’t get out of bed.

  3. Wow, where do you get this hatred from? Get some therapy or something – yeah you don’t like it. Your slacker cool is so fucking uptight – shit just really needles you doesn’t it? You got that journo bile off to a fine art. Crack open another bottle of JD and have another stab at that novel that’s never going to get finished.
    Ooh Ooh someone much more successful than you is doing something over there! Quick write something nasty about it. Phew! That’s them told -aaaaand relax

  4. totes stands for totally. dad is too old to know that but i still love his initiative in spreading amazeballs which he 50/50 understood.

  5. still waiting for the stone roses toaster pastries

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