According to People, TomKat have procreated! We generally leave Hollywood gossip to the celeb blogs, but our rule is: if we can relate it to music, it’s fair game. So you have your choice of Scientology songs: the musical stylings of L. Ron Hubbard (featuring John Travolta, Leif Garrett, and Frank Stallone!) OR …

Leonard Cohen – “Famous Blue Raincoat” (MP3 Link Expired)

Now … what to name the little one? Not Moses I’m guessing.

UPDATE: E! gives us the little girl’s name: Suri. Her name means “princess” in Hebrew, “red rose” in Persian, and she’s already been diagnosed with ADHD, poor thing.

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Comments (28)
  1. spo.  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    suri. it’s named suri.

    first.

  2. quasi  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    how did they keep her quiet the whole time?

  3. L. Ron Hubbard has to be among one of the worst male singers ever.

  4. maria*  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    I thought Sarah meant “princess” in Hebrew. Sounds like Tommo’s bending the rules again!

  5. jack  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    was katie holmes really that bad in Thank You For Smoking? i thought she was fine, but my roommates flipped the hell out and said she was abonimable.

  6. This type of news is dumb and should stop. Stereogum’s not Vh1. I get enough of useless pop culture.

  7. brooke shields also had her baby today….

    same day as tom….

    remembe when they fought about some dumb baby shit?

    maybe they can set up a play date….

  8. jimmy  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    that is going to be one fucked up baby. I heard that tom ate the baby’s placenta. no shit.

  9. memememe  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    Hey maria*, maybe Tom’s saying Suri means “princess” in KABBALAH.

  10. nick  |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2006

    what connection to scientology does leonard cohen have?

  11. wered  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    placenta=a good source of protein. it’s an old tradition also done by many tribal people in africa as well as in ancient greece. just fyi.

  12. But precisely WHEN was it born?

  13. “what connection to scientology does leonard cohen have?”

    Nick, apparently the lines:

    “That night that you planned to go clear
    Did you ever go clear?”

    … are some sort of Scientology reference.

    To think, all these years, I’d assumed it was a heroin reference. Shows you what I know.

  14. Chance MacPherson  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    I thought Leonard was Jewish?

  15. i read that gunk by ronL andit seems we all came from sea shells…yes …i knew Darwin always got it wrong…

  16. Gabi  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    Brook Shield’s baby also born yesterday, that is so ironic.

  17. Josh  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    We get it Tom, you successfully conceived a child, you’re straight, now go away forever

  18. maria*  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    memememe-I still call bullshit. What’s devout Scientologist Cruise looking to Kabbalah for anyway? Aren’t there any nifty intergalactic names to choose from?

  19. Leona  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    I thought that TomKat were having a boy what a surprise that baby is going to be beautiful.

  20. Webbie  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    Suri the Scientologist who will lead us in the promised band ! (Placentanotincluded)

  21. Yeah, like it’s really theirs. It was delivered alright. By some woman who didn’t want a child. Their adoption/delivery date was just that day.
    I claim proof by the simple fact that Tom Cruise is obviously a eunuch.

  22. Leona  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    I wonder if Brooke used any medication to help her thru the delivery and if Katie had to use some oh how Tom would be angry and if Katie needed some and Tom said no he should be inflicted with some pain himself.

  23. Edgewin  |   Posted on Apr 19th, 2006

    I’m not positive, but I think Leonard has since renounced his Scientological (?) ways. Nice track, though.

  24. Actually, Suri in Hebrew (or more accurately, Tzuri) means: My Problem.

    No joke.

  25. Calliwell  |   Posted on Apr 20th, 2006

    Suri in Japanese means “pickpocket”. Sarah in Jewish means “princess” and Tom Cruise means “bat shit crazy” around the world.

  26. blah  |   Posted on Apr 21st, 2006

    dont u people have anything else to do ??? like live your lives not worry about others

  27. Tom Cruise  |   Posted on Apr 25th, 2006

    I wonder how many papers will post the words ‘Tom Cruises little bastard has had a fall’ or ‘Tom Cruise and his little bastard seen here shopping for clothes for mummy’

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