Tired of modern porn? Then head to your dusty vinyl pile for some classic audio erotica. Maxim.com leads the way:
The Strokes, Is This It? (UK version)
Hinder, Extreme Behavior
RATT, Invasion of Your Privacy
The Cars, Candy-O
Roxy Music, Country Life
Madonna, Like a Prayer
Toni Braxton, Libra
Pulp, This Is Hardcore
Shania Twain, Up!
Pixies, Surfer Rosa
Jane’s Addiction, Nothing’s Shocking
Mariah Carey, Butterfly
Christina Aguilera, Stripped
Slunt, Get a Load of This
Slaughter, Stick It to Ya
REO Speedwagon, Hi Infidelity
Shakira, Oral Fixation, Vol. 2
Gwen Stefani, Love. Angel. Music. Baby.
Jennifer Lopez, On the 6
Aerosmith, Pump
Herb Alpert, Whipped Cream & Other Delights
You oughta head here for the visuals, and to mock the cheesy captions (e.g., Toni Braxton’s Libra: “Don’t you wanna get medieval on her astrological sign?” — Wha? That doesn’t even make sense!).
This Shit List really made us scratch our heads. And that’s before we got to Pump. Then again, maybe this explains Hinder’s popularity. But who the hell are Slunt?
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What’s even funnier is that at least 3 of them are men.
So, no Chocolate & Cheese? Those undercleavages are sexy as hell. Go Ween!
I vote for the back cover of Beyonce’s Dangerously in Love.
What about Cut by The Slits?
OMG – Slunt is my friend’s band, and they’re so effing hott!!
http://www.myspace.com/slunt
I don’t like their album cover, but when they used to play shows at the continental abby would get on stage in full-body fishnet, with maybe some undergarments, and she’d rip.
roxy music clearly is the best on the list
also where’s smell the glove? don’t tell me that fictional albums don’t count
Pulp! Pulp! Pulp! Pulp!
Aren’t those two on the cover of Roxy Music’s Country Life actually dudes, though? I thought I read that somewhere once.
We’re talking about Maxim here. They’re not exactly the Village Voice. While I’m sure they know undercleavage, I doubt they know Ween.
Ween is a good choice but, clearly, Sugar Ray’s Lemonade and Brownies should have been mentioned – Nude Nicole Eggert, people!
http://rateyourmusic.com/release/album/sugar_ray/lemonade_and_brownies/
jeez, i had forgot about abby gennet. she was freakin’ hot.
JZ,
they’re not dudes
http://www.answers.com/topic/country-life-album
left out – she wants revenge cover.
Wow. Most of those weren’t even sexy. I guess Mother Teresa in a thong would have made this list.
Chocolate and Cheese, no doubt.
What, no Millie Jackson?
http://www.amazon.com/Back-Shit-Millie-Jackson/dp/B0000004V4/ref=pd_bbs_4/002-1836497-2164044?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1173387175&sr=8-4
Almost none of these are sexy…the Jane’s Addiction one is actually scary.
Here’s my pick for sexiest:
Don’t really like the band, but god damn…
where’s wild cherry’s “i love my music”? i popped many woodies over that one back in the day
Not sexy? Come on, Pulp’s ‘Hardcore’ is pretty damn sexy! So’s ‘Is this it?’ & ‘Country Life’. What do you want? People fucking on the cover?
Jane’s Addiction on the other hand, that cover isn’t sexy at all. Unless you find autopsies a turn on. In which case, stay away from me.
PS – Good call Jon. Leigh Lezark is ridiculously attractive, regardless of what anyone thinks of her personally.
Pump?
Any list of sexy covers that does not include at least one Jeannie C. Riley cover is not good enough. For proof:
http://franklarosa.com/vinyl/Exhibit.jsp?AlbumID=25
Also, Emma Bunton’s Free Me:
two cars that look like dung beetles mating always made me hot.
Whoever said Ween wins! That was the hottest album cover ever.
Truly a shitlist. Black Crowes’ “Amorica” has them all beat:
It’s all about the Ohio Players’ Honey album.
I like how they censored breasts in that piece, but the vagina on the Strokes album is totally okay.
as far a vag album covers go, this one takes the cake
Chocolate and Cheese is obviously one of the sexiest album covers of all time. I mean, scope that under-bewb!
Ween is also one of the great American rock and roll bands.
Viva la Ween!
What about the Yeah Yeah Yeahs self titled EP cover
definitely got to be ween
underboobs and that boognish belt?
no contest
best album musically as well (well tied with surfer rosa)
this is hardcore is a hot cover also.
I’m kind of surprised they left out Louis XIV’s album cover.
The boobs=bad but pubes=good censorship struck me as odd too: the Strokes, Roxy, and Jane’s covers are nippless but hairful.
My theory? The airbrush fans at Maxim are so used to women being as shorn as a cueball down in the lower 48 that they’re unaware of pubic hair as a genital indicative.
If you’ll forgive the jargon.
Roger Waters pros and cons…
How about the original cover for Jimmie Hendrix’s “Electric Ladyland” with the three nude models on it.
Electric Ladyland original cover:
It was not on the cover, but Queen’s original version of the Jazz album contained a poster of hundreds of nude female bicyclists promoting Fat Bottomed Girls
By far one of the sexiest album covers ever is Jeannie C. Riley “The Girl Most likely” where she is setting side saddle on a Honda Motorcycle in a Red Miniskirt and white Go-Go Boots, Jeannie was by far one of the hottest sexiest females in music at that time… this cover is a CLASSIC! Wish it was full size (sorry)
The Ohio Players should have four places on this list. Fire, Honey, Orgasm, Ecstasy. I couldn’t even have them in the house back in the day…