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September 28, 2006

Moby Addicted To Internet, Hates Soap

The last word on Moby's Internet strike, as he has finally admitted it's been a miserable failure:

ok, some random things:
Sep 27, 2006 - nyc

a-i really don't like the smell of dial soap. i was in a bookstore yesterday and i accidentally washed my hands with dial soap and then my hands smelled of dial for 12 hours. gross. i'm not trying to pick a fight with the good people at dial soap, inc. but dial soap smells weird and i don't like it.

b-i went to a fundraiser for amend.org. what a great organization with a great precept. the #1 cause of death for kids in the developing world between the ages of 4 and 21? injury. not illness. not malaria or aids. injury, and usually car accidents.
amend.org is smart. give kids reflectors and they're less likely to get hit by cars. spend 20 cents on a reflector as opposed to hundreds of dollars on medical care. it's smart.

c-my email fast has become an email diet. i'm restricting myself. my original idea was to get rid of:
phone, email, internet, etc, and just sit on my front stoop for an hour a day. it seemed like such a civilized idea. if you wanted to talk to me you could just meet me on my stoop. it ultimately seemed to be a bit too impractical.

d-it's time for sleep.

e-good night.

moby

And the next day?
dial soap...seriously, i had to wash my hands 10 more times with dr bronners soap in order to make my hands not smell like dial soap. again, i'm not picking fights with dial inc, but that dial soap smell makes me queasy. hell is a room with wasps who smell like dial soap. wasps the bug. not wasps the people(aka-my people. aka-white anglo saxon protestants. aka-when/if i have children it cannot be with a white anglo saxon protestant or else our children will be inbred. just fyi. i need to make babies with someone from a different genetic line in order to keep the gene pool healthy and interesting).
So ladies, when you visit Moby on his stoop, good gag gift:

Hey, and if you're not a WASP you might get laid!

Posted at 10:02 AM
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14 Comments

i love that he "accidentally washed his hands."

Posted by: melissa at 09/28/06 10:33 AM | Reply
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Moby should pick a fight with Dial. Dial is the parent company of Right Guard Xtreme, whose commercials featuring alleged pedophile Don Vito Margera continue to air well over a month after he was charged wtih two felony counts of sexual assault on a child in Colorado. /end rant.

Posted by: Michael at 09/28/06 10:39 AM | Reply
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his blog was obviously paid for by doc bronner's soap.

Posted by: balumpus at 09/28/06 10:43 AM | Reply
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God dammit... he's really stuggling for content nowadays isn't he?

Posted by: MIGUELTEJADA at 09/28/06 10:45 AM | Reply
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i was really hoping he was going to talk about how much he hate Snakes On A Plane. that would've been funny.

Posted by: joey at 09/28/06 11:17 AM | Reply
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I will never understand all the Moby hatred lately?? Moby is a pretty down to earth guy that is very approachable and has always been that way from day 1. If Wayne Coyne had a blog it would be even more ridiculuous than this...but you all would praise it because Wayne is "so cool".

Posted by: Joe Mama at 09/28/06 11:45 AM | Reply
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In his defense, that industrial liquid dial does smell a little weird. Like fertilizer mixed with dirt.

But besides that, I thought angels came down and washed Moby's hands with their own heavenly saliva. What's he doing it himself for?

Posted by: Christy at 09/28/06 12:39 PM | Reply
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a) Wayne Coyne makes good music and b) Wayne Coyne is possibly crazy, but doesn't seem to act like it, but anything assholish or crazy he said/did would be met with "Oh, that Wayne!" by fans. Moby, not so.

Posted by: Stephen at 09/28/06 1:47 PM | Reply
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I don't have anything personally against Moby, or least, I didn't until recently. He seems like a nice enough guy, well-spoken in interviews, and he seems to donate to worth charitable causes. It's just that by reading through his blog, you gather how self-important he is. I mean, TWO entries about Dial soap? How angry does soap have to make you in order to run home and write about it on your blog? It's just soap, let it go.

Posted by: S. Jerusalem at 09/28/06 2:02 PM | Reply
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how is it that when my kids are in a car, wearing a reflector will keep them from getting injured.

maybe they're magical reflectors.
or maybe moby is retarded. and he just gave money to a group similar to the "Human Fund".

i'm sorry, but the #1 cause of death in kids are injuries? duh. a percentage of those are car accidents. and a (very small) percentage of those are kids getting hit by cars (with the larger percentage being kids who are riding in cars).

stupid liberal hippie making himself feel better about being a complete useless spaz, by "helping" imaginary kids. because if he got his hands dirty actually helping kids he might have to use whatever soap is around. even...if...it's...DIAL.

Posted by: mattshu at 09/28/06 2:11 PM | Reply
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I like how it's way too "impractical" to spend an hour a day NOT being on the internet. Oh, you bloggies! Oh, and Wayne Coyne would be way more interesting to read BECAUSE he's crazy. Moby's just a little bit too much like every other bored person on the internet

Posted by: Caitlin Hannah at 09/28/06 2:21 PM | Reply
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Thank GOD people are finally starting to see that little creep for the jerk he is.

Posted by: Memememe at 09/28/06 2:35 PM | Reply
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I like Dial soap.

THIS MEANS WAR MOBY, WARRRRRRRR!

hahaha, ok, I'm kidding.

Posted by: Mat at 09/28/06 3:43 PM | Reply
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can you imagine actually having to sit with moby on his stoop and having a conversation? it would be complete torture.

Posted by: Thadeus at 09/28/06 5:26 PM | Reply
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