There is a movie you have not seen starring Gene Wilder, Donald Sutherland, with a cameo appearance by Orson Welles. It was a "comedy" made in 1970. And it is the worst piece of shit I have ever seen. It is called Start The Revolution Without Me.
In it, two sets of twins (yes, it's one of those twins played by the same guy movies), one rich and one poor, are mixed up at birth. But then there's mix-ups, mistaken identities, sex romps and other things people thought were funny in the 1970s. And something about the French Revolution. This "wacky" "farce" is much less "wacky" than it thinks. For instance, what the fuck is this scene:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZ2ApmX4Z08
Ugh, this movie is a real shame. There's such a talented cast. And I got excited at the idea of period piece parody. But this movie is the very worst pile of horse shit I have ever seen. Not a single chuckle. And the ending, oh that ending. It makes zero sense. Like, I really have no idea what was supposed to have happened at the ending. My favorite thing is that the script, which is definitely the biggest problem with this movie, actually got nominated for the Writers Guild Award for best comedy. WHAT? Please watch this terrible movie that probably cost a jillion dollars and probably made zero.
Last year I had the Kool-aid man bursting out of my chest. I ended up getting in my first fistfight since middle school (long story) while wearing it. Afterwards the cops wanted to take pictures of the costume. I swear it wasn't a mug shot.
Just finished this year's costume yesterday:
http://i137.photobucket.com/albums/q205/scarymuppet/Family_Circus5-28-10.gif
Everyone deserves a second chance after making anti-Semitic comments. And then when they blow their second chance for making racist/holy-fuck-you-might-murder-a-woman comments, they deserve another. After all, they were in The Man Without a Face.
Is It weird that I thought this was the strongest episode of the season by far? I thought this was the strongest episode of the season by far. At the very least there was no cricket-chirping clunker this week, which is more than I can say for the rest of the season.
However, I find it super weird that they did that HGTV sketch again. It was basically the exactly the same as the last time they did it. Great sketch, but not really repeatable.
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stein
...and the Chamber of Seabreeze
...and The Pilnser of Azkaban
...and the Gimlet of Fire
...and the Porter of the Phoenix
...and the Half-Price Buds
Oh come on guys, the callers aren't that bad. This guy knows:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YRQlUsdA3U
"You should change you name from C-SPAN to Black-SPAN!"
Think your teenager may be sneaking out at night? Dig a pit in front of their bedroom window, and fill it with sharpened bamboo sticks! Cover that hole with branches and leaves. If you wake to their mangled corpse, you know they've been sneaking out! TRICKY and SNEAKY!
Hey, look at the bright side: Jeff Zucker is being kicked out of NBC!
So long Jeff. And thank you for giving us Outsourced, Fear Factor, Las Vegas, Deal or No Deal, Father of the Pride, Joey, The Marriage Ref, The Jay Leno Show, The Tonight Show With Jay Leno (and not with Conan), A Minute to Win It, America's Got Talent, Thank God You're Here, Quarterlife, Coupling, Emeril, Kath & Kim, Whoopi, and so many other wonderful, wonderful programs.
Never work in television again.
How is this argument between History of Violence and Eastern Promises instead of eXistenZ and eXistenZ?
That said, I definitely vote A History of Violence for a hatefuck so repulsive and unnecessary that it made True Blood seem positively classy.
If you think this was bad, you should have seen last night's Work of Art. The challenge: make a work of art based on a car ride in an Audi. WHAT?
Also, Miles needs to get smacked right in his droopy eyes. GET SOME SLEEP YOU HACK.
When you first enter the castle, go left. There should be a chest there with some coins and the shield of Garrunth. Equip this before you proceed. Go back right and enter the main hall. Take down the fire bats with your bow and arrow (should be easy by now). Step on the platform in the middle of the room The Snakebeast will appear. The weak point is the big bulging eye. If you already have the ice arrows, use those on it. Otherwise just hope you have enough arrows and keep on firing. After you defeat the Snakebeast, your password should reset. Hope this helps!
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