Burdette

Comments from Burdette

“So Monica Lewinsky is back in the news I think. She’s been known for GOING DOWN just like, say, the RATINGS OF THE NBC NETWORK. I’ve been here my whole life, folks.”

0 |
March 28, 2013 on Hey, Want To Write Some NBC Jokes For Jay Leno?

I was struck by how the Paranormal Activity guys are clearly still in love with

– Having a creep watch people sleep/sit up too straight and too fast/wander slowly through a hall
– Having people accidentally drop cameras in the perfect place to catch a spooky surprise
– Having characters constantly ask to not be filmed. “Please don’t film me, there’s a ghost in my teeth.”
– Having an infinite amount of film

This show would’ve been so much easier to make if they’d just shot it without all the characters being 200% aware of the cameras at every waking moment. Half the shots are just hands knocking lenses away. Very good filmmaking from the guys that brought you TMZ.

By TMZ I mean Too Much ‘Zon.

+15 |
February 8, 2012 on Ha Ha, The River!

Pretty insightful for a video made while waiting on his mom to come out of the grocery store.

+10 |
October 13, 2011 on The Logical (And Existential) Fallacy Of “Rock, Paper, Scissors”

Say what you will about prop comedy,

+19 |
September 8, 2011 on Carrot Top Performs Prop Comedy For Vice President Dick Cheney

Guess there’s nothing better to do in that doctor’s office.

+3 |
August 19, 2011 on Awful Screaming Parady Of Rock Singers

How alive is this owl?

+26 |
August 12, 2011 on Q: How Chill Is This Owl?

Is it possible this guy does NOT refer to women as “pieces of ass?”

+9 |
August 5, 2011 on Brett Ratner To Produce This Year’s Academy Awards

You are commenting in character as Greenberg right now.

+46 |
August 1, 2011 on The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Greenberg

“I can eat any man under a table” – TWGPS

+32 |
July 8, 2011 on Quote Of The Day

Hey, guy on the right! Do not sip your coffee during this! This is not PRAYERBUCKS!

+24 |
July 7, 2011 on Michelle Bachmann Prays To God To End Health Care Reform, OBVIOUSLY

There’s a lady on my ride home almost every day who plays “La Cucaracha” and only “La Cucaracha” on an incredibly tiny combination keyboard and recorder.

+9 |
May 4, 2011 on USA #1!

They’re bringin’ hatchback.

+24 |
April 27, 2011 on The Wednesday Dance

Glad to see DVDs can give me the love and companionship of other white people. I need that even more than this download of Love and Other Drugs.

+34 |
April 18, 2011 on Duh Aficionado Magazine: DVDs Are Not That Fun

Tired of your stupid children? Then put on a bib and pour a cauldron of oil all over yourself!

+13 |
April 12, 2011 on This Is Your Adult Bib: The Slobstopper

I mean this as a legitimate question. What would happen to this kid if everyone commented on his video with things like “Keep practicing and you’ll be great one day.” I was thinking about it, and I really don’t know if it would be a good or bad thing. Would it be good to skew positive while encouraging someone to be terrible at something, and thus create more bad raps being uploaded by white teenagers? Or is that potential outcome worse than staying positive? Help, Monsters!

+5 |
April 6, 2011 on The Sixth Month Break Is Over!

The twist is Jaden and Will die in the first 2 minutes and M. Night plays the rest of the parts, all of which are Gods of Writing and Filmmaking that love to watch Lady in the Water over and over again.

+12 |
April 5, 2011 on What Will The Inevitable, Lame, And Obvious Twist Be In The Upcoming Will Smith/Jaden Smith M. Night Shyamalan Movie?

And another thing! I also REALLY hate the fact that, since it’s April Fools Day, I am somehow “gullible” or “dumb” if I fall for something. The fact that something has April 1st stamped on it does not automatically mean it is a prank, and I live in the adult world where I typically just go about my day, not questioning everything around me too much. You’re fired, April Fools Day.

+2 |
April 1, 2011 on Videogum Everywhere Mission: NO APRIL FOOL’S PRANKS!

In the past I’ve found Improv Everywhere to be kind of harmless and uninteresting, but the one this week is atrocious. They’re actively trying to convince someone that one of their “agents” (AGENTS) *agents* was beaten up and wants to press charges against 3 more of their, turns out, ^agents^. Who is having fun in this situation?

“I love watching videos that make me very upset!” – Beelzebub, I guess?

What outcome does this hope for? Everyone learns that one of their #agents wasn’t assaulted and then says, aloud, “I’ve been had! This entire time I was worried for someone’s safety, but in reality we are all safe all the time because everything is just prankz! Just try and stop me, oncoming bus!”

That’s what they want, right? All of us dead? It’s the only thing that makes any sense.

+17 |
April 1, 2011 on Videogum Everywhere Mission: NO APRIL FOOL’S PRANKS!

PUNCH.

“Welcome to Gym.” – Will Smith

+Array |
March 30, 2011 on Kourtney Kardashian “Acts” For 44 Seconds Without Messing Up!

Explain what’s nerdy about using math to make an oblique reference to video resolution, ya jock.

+2 |
March 28, 2011 on Limited Edition Scarface DVD To Cost Entirely Reasonable $1000