hell's belle

Comments from hell's belle

I just realized that if I continue watching True Blood without the complement of fully understanding and appreciating Gabe’s recaps, I will feel so dirty…like cemetery soil in the peehole dirty :(

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June 11, 2012 on You Get The True Death, True Blood

Nooooooooooooooo! The only reason I’ve been able to watch True Blood since Season 1 was knowing I could come here and read the Sanity and Truth in the Gospel of Gabe.

Eff you, True Blood. If you had — *spoiler alert* — killed Tara instead of making her immortal, I’m sure Gabe would still be recapping. ABR.

I can understand your not wanting to slog through 11-ish more hours of TB, Gabe, but I do hope you reconsider. No pain, no gain? Comedy forged from suffering? And look at what’s coming up in the next three eps…so much to rip apart:

–bromance between Eric and Bill as they search for the risen Russell Edgington!

–return of evangelist-turned-vampire Reverend Steve Newlin!

–in-fighting among the Vampire Authority council, lead by Roman (Law & Order: SVU’s Christopher Meloni)!

–[Sookie] drain[ing] nearly every bottle of alcohol in her house and get[ting] goofy to Jimmy Buffett!

–a confusing theological debate about Lilith, the “Vampire Bible,” and a “sanguinistas”-versus-mainstreamers conflict within the vampire community!

–Meloni’s Roman and his ilk—which includes the actual Biblical temptress Salome (Valentina Cervi) herself!

[list items are quoted from Jace Lacob’s review at The Daily Beast]

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June 11, 2012 on You Get The True Death, True Blood

No, I liked the unpredictability. This season has been different, IMO, in that it’s been predictable. It seems every watcher predicted a suicide, and a good many predicted it would be Lane.

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June 4, 2012 on Mad Men: Everybody Hurts

I don’t think Betty forgot how to hug her daughter. I read that as she was utterly taken aback that Sally *wanted* a hug from her.

Sorry, but I’m disappointed in this season. Full disclosure: I hate/boredom-watch Mad Men (how gauche, I know) but the one thing it did right, subtlety, has gone out the window this season. It’s so self-conscious and self-aware. Blech. When’s the last time any watcher could actually predict what would happen?

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June 4, 2012 on Mad Men: Everybody Hurts

This is weird. I just today finished watching the entire series — started out about a month and a half ago. I’ve been here reading old posts on what I considered the more WTF-ish episodes, and now there’s a new post about Lost? What?

Sorry to say I was disappointed in the show. I thought the first season was great and had a lot of potential, and I was still engaged with Seasons 2 and 3, but by 4 and on through 5 and 6, the show had jumped the tracks. It started out telling one story and completely abandoned it for another.

A lot of defenders of Lost will talk about “how do you expect answers to every single little question?” But that’s not what a lot of us who are let down by the show feel. It’s that a story makes a promise, and it is the creator of that story’s job to follow through on that promise. If s/he does not honor that promise, the audience is going to feel ripped off. (Nancy Kress talks about this in her writing guide Beginnings, Middles, and Ends — calls it “the implicit promise.”)

I loved that Sayid, after resorting to torture to try and get Shannon’s asthma medicine from Sawyer, felt ashamed and attempted to exile himself. I think the show should have followed that path with that character. Instead he becomes a full-on torturer/assassin in a tired action-adventure film. What happened to his deep guilt over his torturing past?

Ben seemed pretty important to the overall mythos of the show. What happened there? He flipped-flopped more than that poor fish in that one music video from the early ’90s, and I still feel like they never managed to bring the writing to the same level of the acting Michael Emerson did and was capable of.

Jin and Sun are perfectly OK with Jin committing suicide? Not even one peep about Jin Yeon needing a parent? Just no.

And that totally weirdo episode with Allison Janey had a chance, I think, to tie some stuff together but just ended up muddying the waters more. I thought that maybe Janey’s character was the lover of a god, exiled to that island — an island with mysterious power(s). And I thought perhaps Jacob and his brother’s real mother was actually a goddess. Because where did they get their “powers” and “specialness” from? And I thought maybe the fake mom was barren…or that the real mom cursed the island after her babies were stolen from her, as she was dying (cursed it so that women could not carry pregnancies to term there).

I don’t know. Just all this stuff swirling in my head. Thanks, Kelly, for giving me a place to talk about it. I don’t have a blog, and I am loath to comment on post that are two years old. I should change my handle to “tardytotheparty.”

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May 2, 2012 on Damon Lindelof Hints That Lost May Return, BUT HOW?

Some of the weak performances really hurt Coppola’s Bram Stoker’s Dracula, but Gary Oldman was excellent as was the writing. And of course the costume design. And Coppola’s use of old-fashioned FX is still refreshing today especially in contrast to cartoonish CGI.

I wouldn’t call it very silly at all. But the casting of certain actors and/or not taking them in hand with direction was very unfortunate.

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November 23, 2011 on Please Leave Your Pro Mirror, Mirror Comments In The Comments

Didn’t Bobby Flay get the honor of revealing Mrs. Ari’s name in this ep? Melissa?

I believe when Ari was leaving, Flay was trying to calm her and said, “Melissa.” Maybe I’m hallucinating…

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August 29, 2011 on Entourage S08E06: Welcome To Baked Clamswood!

*It’s actually Big Sam who saves Scarlett, and she does recognize him when he calls out to her.

(My memory’s almost as rusty as Grrg’s ;))

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July 21, 2011 on The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Eat, Pray, Love

Well, here’s one problem with only returning to Videogum for Gabe’s True Blood recaps: replying to comments WAY too late.

Grrg, it is a white man who attacks Scarlett in Shantytown. It is a black man who saves her so that she can recover from fainting and escape. In fact, she was so distraught she didn’t even notice that it was Polk from Tara who saved her.

Her husband and his friends do form a vigilante group to “clean up Shantytown,” though…but by no means is the area populated only or even heavily with black people.

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July 19, 2011 on The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Eat, Pray, Love

Geez, Kelly, way to harsh on all male Monsters’ hard-ons! How DARE you.

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July 18, 2011 on Alison Brie And Gillian Jacobs GQ “Lesbian Scene” Open Thread

Henceforth, a show jumping the shark will be referred to as “twisting Lorena’s neck.”

Example: True Blood twisted Lorena’s neck from its premiere episode.

Also, Lou Pine’s/Lupines. Ah, True Blood, you slay you. No, for real…slay you.

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June 29, 2010 on True Blood S03E03: So This Show Is Just Straight-Up Porno Now?

Well done on smacking down the uppity fat man, Bigotgum.

It’s disgusting to see the pigs wallow in their thin privilege.

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February 22, 2010 on 24 Reasons Why Kevin Smith Needs To Shut Up Now

*Spoiler alert*

In the books, Maryann is a maenad. The orgy thing makes a mite more sense then. No, not really.

Yeah, shut urp. I’ve read the books. So what! They are soooooooooo much just as bad as the show.

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July 14, 2009 on True Blood: Werewolf Bar Mitzvah, Basically

Thanks for the correction, Andy. Commentary on how f*cked up sexism is = good; sexism as a way of life = Entourage.

I’m getting a restraining order against you, Entourage.

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July 13, 2009 on Entourage: It’s 2004 Somewhere

Gah, Gabe! What are you doing to me? I sit through *two* True Blood eps for nothing? I thought we had a deal! And I have to wade over here to an Entourage post (uh, how is this show allowed to exist when it’s the most sexist thing on TV…yeah, I think even worse than Mad Men and isn’t it on purpose there?) to find out I got True Blood all in my eyes for nothing? Another day? Pfft, way to treat your fans.

I sentence you to 24 hours of comment reading at the True Blood LiveJournal community.

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July 13, 2009 on Entourage: It’s 2004 Somewhere