Comments from sharked

But at least it provides the PERFECT time to make that "fake and gay" joke.
+11 |
July 13, 2011 on Jake Gyllenhaal IS Mr. Cool Shirt
I'm no photoshop expert, you guys; but I'm pretty sure this is definitely photoshopped.
+18 |
July 13, 2011 on Jake Gyllenhaal IS Mr. Cool Shirt
All I have to say is the guy in the background in the suit is THE BEST. I have so many questions about that guy!
+29 |
November 22, 2010 on The Audience’s Reaction To Oprah’s “Favorite Things” Is My Favorite Thing
When I was in college, we would always get offers to go to free advance movie screenings. I went to go see the Lord of War screening, and, well, Lions Gate accidentally sent the theater the Undiscovered, starring Ashlee Simpson. Pretty much the most confusing 15 minutes of my life.
+8 |
November 18, 2010 on Haha: Children See Saw 3D Instead Of Megamind
So, uhm, I used to date this girl who had a roommate? And this roommate started dating Tucker Max? And then left Tucker Max to marry Ian Ziering?! WOOF. Sometimes life is just TOO MUCH.
+14 |
October 27, 2010 on Meet Ian Ziering: Professional Cosmetics Company Representative
Directed by Roman Polanski.
+8 |
July 15, 2010 on Teenage Boy In Town
Who's that one actor from Entourage who is just as douchey as his onscreen character??
+3 |
June 23, 2010 on Best New Party Game 26: Do You Mean The One Where…
The tumbling "rocks" reminded me of the styrofoam rocks they used to throw at the kids climbing the AggroCrag on GUTS - I was seriously expecting GLITTER EXPLOSIONS at any moment.
+21 |
May 24, 2010 on Lost S06E18: Series Finale. R.I.P.
Okay, I am no Professor in Indian or Race Studies, over here, nor have I watched more than that 90 second clip that was posted yesterday, but I am going to go ahead and say - yes, "Outsourced" is racist and very much THE WORST. The show's attempt at comedy is not derived from the cleverness/wittiness of the characters themselves, but from them doing the dumbest, unfunny things in a goofy, exaggerated, and awful Indian caricatures. For instance, the clip posted yesterday features 1) a guy quoting Glengarry Glen Ross 2) a girl singing and 3) a guy dancing and singing. None of these things, on their own, would be remotely funny to anyone. If this show was a bunch of white guys doing such things, America would be all, "wtf." But, throw in some HILARIOUS INDIANS doing them in GOOFY ACCENTS, then we have AMERICAN COMEDY GOLD. Ugh.
+7 |
May 18, 2010 on Hey Look, Racists, FOX Presents Its Fall Line-Up
Okay, I said this last night in chat, but SO SELFISH, JIN! "I will kill myself so you don't have to die alone, despite the fact THAT WE HAVE A FULLY ALIVE CHILD TO RAISE. This makes sense. Too much sense."-- Dr. Jin-Soo Kwon, PhD, Family Ethics/Logic.
+34 |
May 5, 2010 on Lost S06E15: How Do You Say “R.I.P.” In SPOILER ALERT?
Look in the cell phone. See what you saw. Take the saw and cut the flashlight in half. Two halves make a whole. Climb out of the coffin through the hole. Duh.
+31 |
May 3, 2010 on Quick Question About The Buried Trailer
Anyone know what T.V. stands for?
+6 |
April 22, 2010 on You Are About To Be Famous! (Or Raped!)
If only Jack could find someway to make use of his insane ability to swim ridiculously long distances fully clothed, Timberlanded, and backpacked.
+28 |
April 21, 2010 on Lost S06E14: You Belong With Locke
You guys, is there any possible way to get pass those horrendously terrible HOW TO WEAR IT ads!? ARGH!! It is not even 11am and I am TYPING SO HARD I'VE BROKEN SEVERAL OF MY MACBOOK AIRS.
+10 |
April 12, 2010 on Saturday Night Live: Tina Fey <3’s Justin Bieber 4evar
Assholes? Hey now, you basically saying all our Moms are assholes. Well, um, at least my mom. Sigh.
+9 |
April 6, 2010 on Who Wants All This The Marriage Ref?
(Hah, this was me just jokin', forgetting that any ridiculous statement about this show has the potential to be taken seriously because the show itself is so ridiculous. So, apologies!)
-8 |
March 24, 2010 on Lost S06E09: Aye Carumba!
So the lead actress of The Blind Side is married to a white supremacist?? COINCIDENCE?!
+2 |
March 24, 2010 on Everything You Need To Know About The Sandra Bullock Cheating Scandal In 100 Seconds
who said "The New World" they were referring to was America, HMMMM?!?
+4 |
March 24, 2010 on Lost S06E09: Aye Carumba!
Despite his resemblance, Sam Eagle would NOT approve of these shenanigans.
+15 |
March 23, 2010 on Joe Biden Is The Permanent Headliner At The Gaffe Factory!
why can't monsters get along with other monsters?
+7 |
March 19, 2010 on Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments
He is my Dad. And I love him.
+6 |
March 18, 2010 on Joe Biden: Father, Husband, Vice President, Stand Up Comedian.
The most disappointing part of my day? Discovering the Die Antwoord videos have yet to be given closed captioned access.
+10 |
March 4, 2010 on YouTube’s New Closed Captions Are Working Perfectly, Or: Best New Party Game: 17
WHEN IS THE REPLIES!? (i used this joke last week. i know no shame)
+19 |
March 3, 2010 on Lost S06E06: The Bad Sayid (Get It? You Get It!)
Are those JNCO jorts?!? Jncorts? Amazing.
+7 |
February 25, 2010 on Duh Aficionado Magazine: Kevin Smith Needs To Shut Up
He probably just mistakenly left out the "x 100." Relax.
-1 |
February 25, 2010 on You Are Following @ConanOBrien
Today's headline: "Millions of Elderly Dead from Blown Minds."
+32 |
February 25, 2010 on 4Chan For $1000, Alex
At first I was like "His scar is on the DIFFERENT SIDE!!," but then I was like "Mirrors, foolin' me again."
+40 |
February 24, 2010 on Lost S60E05: Jack May Or May Not Have What It Takes
I think answering machines were still okay in 2004! (Still doesn't explain why he had his OWN answering machine, but yeah).
+4 |
February 24, 2010 on Lost S60E05: Jack May Or May Not Have What It Takes