the hammer is my penis

Comments from the hammer is my penis

Yay me, indeed. Penis stories are the best kind of stories! I see the logic of not using euphemisms when talking to kids about genitalia. Better to teach them correctly them to fill their heads with silly nicknames just to make the adults more comfortable, I assume is the logic? Makes sense. But I know I would just chicken out and be all, "ummm.. well, Johnny, that's the doggie's super-secret special dingalingdong." Which is why I could never work at a daycare center. That, and the court order. Thank you Hausfrau for the suggestions. "The Penis is my Penis" and "The Hammer is My Pennies," are definitely in contention. But after reading your story, I'm now also considering changing my name to, "The Hammer is Mr. Hausfrau's Dog's Red Rocket." I can't see any reason Gabe would bristle at that.
+16 |
April 30, 2011 on Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments
But see, now I'm torn. I love me some "Dr. Horrible," but at the same time, Gabe apparently hates my handle, and I am merely a guest in his bloghouse. Gabe, would, "The Pliers are my Penis," be less distasteful?
+41 |
April 29, 2011 on Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments
BIG congratulations Werrtrew. Awesome news. ("Elizabeth Rose" is a great name too). As a father of two, I will tell you this: if you haven't yet watched, "The happiest baby on the block," please do. The five "S"'s will save your sanity.
+22 |
April 29, 2011 on Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/gabe.png
+4 |
April 29, 2011 on Gabe And Max Like The Internet: Episode One
Isn't it bad feng shui to have the Rick Astley album cover on the same horizontal plane as the "baby's first green plastic ring stack" toy?
+11 |
April 29, 2011 on Gabe And Max Like The Internet: Episode One
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/liz2.jpg
+18 |
April 29, 2011 on Thursday Night TV Open Thread: Goodbye, Michael Scott
And I realized that, like, the MOMENT I hit "submit comment." Me: "Duh, because there's three of them, so they make a sandwich, and Steve Martin is the bread, and..." Sigh. My mother always told me I was too dumb to understand sandwich jokes. I never realized just how right she was. I still love the basic concept of Steve Martin bread, however.
+9 |
April 28, 2011 on The Three Amigos Reunited!
I have no idea what this is referring to, but I still love this quote.
+4 |
April 28, 2011 on The Three Amigos Reunited!
Mr. Richard Schroeder concurs. http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/rick.jpg
+5 |
April 28, 2011 on Donald Trump Secures The Powerful Joey Lawrence Endorsement
I hope you know that now, not only is Jerry Jones going to draft you in round 2, he's going to trade UP to get you.
+2 |
April 28, 2011 on Donald Trump Secures The Powerful Joey Lawrence Endorsement
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/joey.jpg
+19 |
April 28, 2011 on Donald Trump Secures The Powerful Joey Lawrence Endorsement
Remember kids: Tricks are something a whore does for money. Or candy! http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/job2.jpg
+30 |
April 28, 2011 on Make Believe Trailer, You Guys
Me, One Hour Ago: "I think I'll make a dumb NFL reference on Videogum. No one's gonna read it, probably." Me, 30 Seconds Ago: "Let's check out that sports joke to see how many downvotes it got and... whoa! Lookit all the dudes talking football! Sweet!" (Me, About 9 Hours From Now: "Goddammit Jerry Jones. You screwed up ANOTHER Cowboys draft?!?!")
+9 |
April 28, 2011 on 10 Tips For Hosting A Royal Wedding Viewing Party
Frigid and square. The perfect metaphor for their love.
+53 |
April 28, 2011 on 10 Tips For Hosting A Royal Wedding Viewing Party
Why are we even talking about the royal wedding when the NFL draft is tonight? If you want me to give a shit about Prince William and Miss Catherine, tell me their 40 yard dash times and which of them tested positive for steroids.
+26 |
April 28, 2011 on 10 Tips For Hosting A Royal Wedding Viewing Party
"our wheels touched and ground together and he fell down on the rink " Bullshit. You PUSHED me.
+53 |
April 27, 2011 on The Bully Project Trailer, You Guys
http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/cool.jpg
+31 |
April 27, 2011 on Lindsay Lohan On The Tonight Show OR: Pets Wearing Sunglasses
"She did HOW much coke?!" http://i242.photobucket.com/albums/ff185/Deebs2288/dog2.jpg
+15 |
April 27, 2011 on Lindsay Lohan On The Tonight Show OR: Pets Wearing Sunglasses
Meanwhile on Earth2, Cindy McCain is watching Charles Gibson and Ricki Lake share a McRib.
+Array |
April 26, 2011 on The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Michelle Obama Watches Al Roker And Kelly Ripa Eat A Crepe
Al Roker and Kelly Ripa enjoy a date crepe.
+Array |
April 26, 2011 on The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Michelle Obama Watches Al Roker And Kelly Ripa Eat A Crepe