Comments

You SHOULD toss in the towel after "Games of Cones", because that's the obvious best-ever answer right there.
Oh good, I feel better now.
I'm really sorry Taylor Swift doesn't want to be your IRL BFF, Gabe, but please stop taking it out on your shift key.
Yes. The rest of us are singing it to "I Walk the Line", duh.
Drew Barrymore's, "I Have the Wine" is one of my favorite songs.
You know, you actually had a point about differing cultural references, but I'm not sure where the 'heavyset' part came in.
Butbutbut they were going to select only the smartest, healthiest individuals! You mean Space Eugenics is an impossibility?? Back to the ubermensch drawing board, I guess.
I like how people think that saying "Wow, that was really tasteless and not very funny, and I really don't think you should've have said that, because it makes you sound like an asshole" is the same thing as trying to take away their freedom of speech. No one is trying to pass any laws to get you to shut up, Jeffrey Ross. We're just *telling* you to shut up, which is.... (wait for it).... (wait a little longer)... FREEDOM OF SPEECH.
Oh, thank goodness! I was just wondering what to do with all of these sick beats I have.
Kelly, I think you have a problem, and that problem is spider videos. Now that your addiction has progressed to the point where it's beginning to affect those around you-- i.e. US-- you really need to seek help. It's not just about you and your life anymore.
When I was but a little egg-- maybe 7 years old-- I was really afraid that there were monsters under my bed. I used to insist on sleeping in my parents' room at night, because, as we all know, monsters don't hide under parents' beds. My dad was getting pretty fed up with this, so I decided one night that I'd have to convince him I was *extra* scared. I snuck out of bed, down the hall, opened their door, and screamed for dramatic effect. You know, because of the monsters? Apparently my parents thought I was screaming because of something else, something that I couldn't even see because it was so dark. But anyway, that's how I got my first sex talk.
You know most eggs are brown, right? Or is this a 'only white people eat eggs!' thing, because I've never heard that one.
Um... http://lmgtfy.com/?q=brown+eggs
"Xenophobic! Not necessarily racist! There's a difference!" --a food visage... well, an *ethnic* food visage... which kind of damages his credibility, if you know what I mean (What I mean is I'm xenophobic, but definitely not racist)
Or they're making a statement that being openly gay would hurt their careers, because the world is so incredibly homophobic still and maybe we should work on fixing that first. (Also, they're Scientologists, and there's probably no more homophobic religion than Scientology. So that's another thing.)
I say that, from now on, instead of assuming that everyone is straight until proven otherwise, we don't assume anything! Or, actually, even better, let's assume that everyone is gay until proven otherwise. "Did you hear about John Travolta?" "Yeah, I heard that guy's married... *to a woman!* I'm pretty sure he could be straight!"
I'm pretty sure that making fun of people for being mentally ill isn't any better than making fun of people for being gay. Like, *pretty* sure, but who knows, really? I think I'll just stick to making fun of people who are so insulated by wealth and fame that they can't recognize that they're acting like jackasses. Also, Scientologists.
Sweeeetttt. Lance Bass and I are totally getting married then, because I prayed for that shit *hard* when I was 12. I think the whole 'gay' thing is just to throw off the other NSYNC fans.