There are more people from West Michigan on here than I expected. I really wish something like this had happened to Miranda instead. Having met her personally, she is a smug, self-righteous, BITCH.
See, I think Crank exists to expose other retarded action movies for what they are. The fact that it does this while remaining ridiculously entertaining is pretty admirable. I don't think the rape scene is supposed to be rational. It's basically making fun of the usual action movie cliche that women love dangerous, musclebound men and will love them unconditionally, regardless of all the terrible shit they have to go through to do it. Crank just takes this 5 levels higher than your average action movie does, just like it does with every other terrible action movie cliche (i.e. terrible/vague/incomprehensible/nonsensical plots, random fight scenes, ridiculously over the top stunts).
I feel like this is the end of Harry and the Hendersons, but there's NO LESSON. Where will I get my Paul Rudd news from now? I would never have watched the interview where he and Jason Segel make fart noises without you, Lindsey. You will certainly be missed.
I don't want to turn this into nitpickgum, or anything, but Hoekstra is a Representative. The most conservative district in my state might be crazy enough to elect him, but Michigan would NEVER allow him to be Senator.
I know he's not the epitome of acting or good looks, but couldn't Will Ferrel qualify? I mean, his empire has already shown a few cracks in it (Semi-Pro and Land of the Lost bombed), and he can't possibly keep this up forever. Combine that with the amount of money he must have, and I think he could at least be considered.
I'm ecstatic when I get in the teens on comments (which is REALLY pathetic), so I think I can already concede any chance of a top 5 finish. I'll leave that to Kenny Powers and Booferama.
Wish this had been around the week Gabe posted about Tom Jane's new man-whore show on HBO, so that one of the many "I just want my kids back" jokes could've been featured. Those were (collectively) my favorite post ever.
Am I going to get beaten up for saying I think Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix is the best of the year thus far?
I can't get all that into Dirty Projectors. It's like Portishead last year. I recognize that it's a good album, it just doesn't appeal to me.
Danny Boyle directed Trainspotting and 28 Days Later. I don't care if he eats orphan children in his spare time, that man should be able to work as long as he wants.
(Kinda/Sorta) Wayne Gretzky approved! If we start making cheesy videos again, they should have to be endorsed by a random sports star who'll be irrelevant in 10 years or so. This year's player? Kobe Bryant.
Uh... are we sure this isn't a parody of these types of things? Because that's what it seems like to me(i.e. REALLY REALLY overdone "wholesome" stereotypical family, super broad liberal stereotypes, very over-the-top situation, liberal use of cliches). They totally nailed that Mom, though. "Hey, I know that you're pregnant, which is a big deal, and that you're verbally abusing us, but WHO WANTS COOKIES?"
Bill Murray played Hunter S. Thompson in the ill-fated movie "Where the Buffalo Roam," and was nearly killed by the Dr., who was so paranoid that he tied Bill to a lawn chair and threw in his pool. They ended up being good friends afterward, though.
This looks like Half-Life 2, but if Gordon Freeman and the other survivors were made out of burlap. Seriously, those red-eyed things look JUST LIKE something the Combine would have. I can only imagine they used Coheed and Cambria in the trailer to draw the usual Tim Burton-obsessed scenesters out of the woodwork.
I like how JFK is somehow still alive and giving speeches when he would've been 91, and that not only did Lenny Bias NOT die of a cocaine overdose before playing a single NBA game, he also won the MVP award at age 46. That's some nice info, fake NY Post, but get it together Fringe writing staff (still makes more sense than anything else on this show).
Man, and I was just giving him a second chance for his debate with Bill Simmons today on ESPN.com. Oh, fuck. Wait. No one here likes sports. Fuck... I'll be outside.
Did you take a bit of a jab at Mr. Smith Goes To Washington? Because if you don't like that movie, I WILL FIGHT YOU. No one insults Jimmy Stewart and gets away with it. NO ONE!
The Big Lebowski: LA slacker helps a friend conceive.
The Evil Dead: Five friends spend an eventful weekend at a cabin.
Lord of the Rings: Four friends come of age on long trek.
Being John Malkovich: Man goes to great lengths for coworker's love.
Burn After Reading: Retired CIA Agent reflects on life, writes memoirs.
The Departed: Neurotic informant sees a psychiatrist
Rushmore: Wealthy industrialist mentors a precocious high school student.
Is it wrong that my first thought when Desmond got shot was: "OH NO! HE SHOT HIS GROCERIES!" and not fearing for Des' safety? Regardless, that ass-whooping he gave Ben was pure satisfaction.
It was really similar to a Derrick Comedy sketch (He really gave it to me). When I have to compare those two things... SNL loses.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRfRLPHk44w
I can totally imagine Kenny Powers pulling a Kenny Rogers (the former Yankee/Ranger/Tiger, not of Kenny Rogers' Roasters fame) and punching a cameraman. Everything Danny McBride touches turns to gold.
I went back just to make sure that was him. I know it looks just like him, but I find it easier to believe that it's some sort of dated sports personality that looks very similar to him. Otherwise, it makes no sense. I mean, was he invited because ESPN loved his work in Con Air?
Also, is it just me or did Ken Griffey Jr. look REALLY pissed at all of Norm's jokes?
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