Posts tagged "Nightmares"

The One Where I Took The TMZ Tour Of Hollywood

[Originally posted on March 15th, 2012.] As part of this year's Videogum Oscar Pool, Kelly and I made a side bet wherein the loser had to suffer not only the indignity of making a poor guess about who would win Best Sound Editing, but also to suffer some further humiliation. Had Kelly… More »

By: Gabe Delahaye / February 7, 2014

It’s All Right, What We Thought Was An Abandoned Baby Is Just A Bag Of Snakes

"It is better," said an onlooker. "Right. I mean. The thought of someone abandoning their baby in a dumpster is just horrible. It's crazy how often you hear things like that on the news -- sometimes I feel like they should call it the bad news, hah," said another. "Yeah, seriously, the thought of that… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / January 30, 2014

That’s Your Town: The Town With All The Bats

"Oh, the bats? I love them! Do people have a problem with them? Huh. You know, people are so strange -- you grow up thinking that most people are probably like you and your family, but as you get older you realize that we're all just so different. I guess that's not really something you… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / December 11, 2013

Whatever Is Underwater Is A Fucking Nightmare And We Should Stay Out Of It

Hey, whatever happened to minding our own business? Whatever happened to staying up on land, where we belong? Walking along the street, whistling to ourselves, thinking about our own on-land days? Whatever happened to being happy enough looking at all the disgusting stupid land bugs we have to deal with, and not even bothering with… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / November 19, 2013

ALL OF THE JENNIFERS ARE GETTING HAIRCUTS!

What the fuck is going on?! We turn our backs for two seconds, minding our own god damn business for once in our lives, and Jennifer Aniston goes and gets a Brazilian blowout to which her hair badly reacts and then she CUTS IT OFF TO ABOVE HER SHOULDERS?!!???? UHHHHHH, what?! Then we tur… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / November 6, 2013

That’s Your Halloween Costume: This Sheldon Cooper Mask

"I love my Halloween costume. Aaahh, I love it, I love it, I love it. I wish I could always wear my Halloween costume and just never take it off, never never never! Ha-hah, ahh, no, I'm kidding. Can you imagine what that would be like? I would wake up in the morning and look… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / October 31, 2013

The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It?! Contest: This Nicolas Cage Costume

I'm usually never too enthusiastic when girls choose boring, pretty Halloween costumes for a Halloween costume party, like Jackie O or Audrey Hepburn or Marilyn Monroe or Nicolas Cage Body Suit, but I actually think this one is really well done! Like, sure it's just beautiful and could probably be worn outside of a costume… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / October 29, 2013

The Videogum Movie Club: Gravity

By now, Neil deGrasse Tyson has already tweeted about the many inaccurate elements of Gravity's plot, and Alfonso Cuarón has already responded to those who might be critical of those less-than-truthful elements with -- to paraphrase -- "uh yeah, I know about those things and I don't care; it's a movie."… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / October 7, 2013

Dallas Is Covered In Spiders And Spider Webs

You wake up in your bed, same as ever, but something seems a little off. You've woken to your alarm, so it must be early morning, but outside your windows it seems like night. Actually, upon closer inspection, it doesn't seem like anything -- it seems each and every one of your windows has bee… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / September 26, 2013

OBVIOUSLY YOU SHOULDN’T PLAY AROUND WITH GIANT WATER BUGS

"Oh, it's just a little bug. It's probably more afraid of me than I am of it." That's you, right? "Why would I be afraid of a bug? It's just a part of nature. It's not going to kill me or anything. It probably won't even bother me unless I agitate it." That's you? You… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / September 5, 2013

John McCain Defends His Decision To Play Poker On His iPhone During Yesterday’s Syria Hearing

"Sometimes when I'm at a hearing in front of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee attempting to make the case to proceed with military action in Syria, a decision of which I am one of the most outspoken voices, I get a leeeeeeetle bit bored! Haha, that's my Triumph the Insult Comic Dog impression. Ahahah. Good,… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / September 4, 2013

Joe Francis Update: Joe Francis Is Going To Jail

Back in May, Joe Francis was found guilty of three counts of false imprisonment, one count of assault, and one count of dissuading a witness from reporting, by a "mentally f–ing retarded" jury made up of men and women who "should be euthanized" because they had "naturally selected [themselves]."  Eek! It is so… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / August 28, 2013

The World Is Still A Vampire: Amanda Berry Concert Appearance Addition

After spending almost a decade in captivity, Cleveland kidnapping victim Amanda Berry made her first public appearance on stage at a morning zoo radio summer festival, obviously. She was surrounded by an entourage on stage who threw their hands into the air like they certainly didn't care quite as much as one might think… More »

By: Gabe Delahaye / July 30, 2013

Uh, So, Do You Guys Watch The Bachelorette?

Before last night, I had never seen an episode of either The Bachelor or The Bachelorette. What I have seen many seasons of, though, is Burning Love, which is perfect, and it was that web series that piqued my interest in the reality TV on which it is based. But, uh, The BacheloretteMore »

By: Kelly Conaboy / July 30, 2013

Count Your Blessings Today

No matter what's happening in your life right now, it could be worse: you could be at Comic-Con! #BLESSED… More »

By: Gabe Delahaye / July 19, 2013

Weatherwoman Reacts Appropriately To Massive Spider, Is Mocked

Imagine this: You've arrived for a day of work at your job. Pretty normal so far, right? Well keep reading!!! You stop by your desk, drop off your bag, and then head to the break room for a cup of coffee. Sharon's in there and you pause for a moment weighing having to deal with… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / June 24, 2013

Batman Theme, With Bat Sounds

You'd think that the world is full of enough nightmares naturally that people wouldn't create them on purpose, but here we are. (Via Vulture.)… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / June 21, 2013

Sixth Grade Teacher Shows Class Saw, Is The Worst

I might have mentioned this before, but it's relevant here, so SUE ME! Sue me about it. When I was in fourth or fifth grade, a Catholic nun showed our music class Titanic because she didn't know there were boobs in it. As soon as the boobs showed up on screen she rushed to the… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / June 11, 2013

Group Sing-Along On Broken Plane: Better Or Worse?

WORSE! Ah, sorry. I didn't even ask the question yet, and here I am forcing my opinio--WORSE! WORSE WORSE WOSE WORSE! Imagine this: You've been stranded on the Tarmac for two hours. It's hot and you have no idea what time you'll be leaving. You have water and you have some airline peanuts, but that'… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / June 11, 2013

Morning Nightmare Watch: Julius Escaping

"Bored of being in a dark room, she flips on the light, opens the door and bails. This particular episode takes place at 1am." Oh no, "good job" is totally 100% what I was going to say too. (Thanks for the tip, Robert.)… More »

By: Kelly Conaboy / June 4, 2013
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