Craftwerk: The 10 Weirdest Nirvana Crafts On The Web

Craftwerk: The 10 Weirdest Nirvana Crafts On The Web

From the beginning, rock and roll music has always possessed the capacity to create seismic paradigm shifts in the fashion world, but perhaps none happened so suddenly or unexpectedly as the one created by the arrival of Nirvana on the mainstream stage. Appearing on the heels of a near full decade of Sunset Strip hair metal and high glamour quotient synth and dance pop, the band bashed onto the industry scene with an authenticity absent since the highwater mark of punk rock’s first wave. For fans of the American independent scene, Kurt Cobain’s preference for thrift store cardigans, flannel shirts, and the occasional, androgynous pink dye job was no surprise. It was, in fact, a longstanding shorthand for a kind of proletariat music that was played in unfashionable and unseasonal places between Minneapolis and Olympia — an aesthetic cobbled together from relative poverty and the dictates of a climate where tank tops and high heels were insufficient to ward off pneumonia. Michael Nelson recently wrote enjoyably on these pages, positing the Strokes as a kind of epitome of the cross section between rock music and fashion, and suggesting that for good or ill they have ultimately proved better at selling Converse sneakers than actual music. He’s likely right about that, but Nirvana sold their fair share of Converse before them, and the Replacements before that. (Is this what we have always been building toward??)

Unlike previous Craftwerk subjects like Prince and David Bowie, Cobain remains a complicated, ambiguous figure with regard to his impact on fashion. Though quite obviously an embarrassment of handsome, he was seemingly no clotheshorse, and peers like Eddie Vedder and Chris Cornell manifested a more stereotypical rock god posture. Much of Cobain’s self-presentation seemed cribbed from Sonic Youth and Paul Westerberg, a sort of studied carelessness that melded uncannily, and ominously, with his fragile, youthful beauty.

Farcically, but also in the exact manner one would expect, the lords of high fashion soon descended upon what was now being referred to as “grunge,” to the significant misery of anyone who had cared about the music before. In 1992, Vogue published a polarizing editorial spread of grunge fashion featuring androgynous models wearing homespun dresses and oversized flannel coats, which chagrined many designers, fashion editors, and critics alike. Designer Jean Paul Gaultier told Vogue in a haze of class-conscious confusion that “Grunge is nothing more than the way we dress when we have no money,” fashion critic Suzy Menkes declared grunge “ghastly,” and Marc Jacobs was ultimately released from a position at Perry Ellis for his grunge collection. But the final nail was driven into grunge couture’s pine box coffin by none other than Vogue Editor in Chief Anna Wintour — fashion’s own Wicked Witch of the West — when she declared in 1994 that all Vogue shoots going forward had to be high fashion and glamorous.

And yet, weird as it may sound, Cobain made all the sense in the world as a fashion icon. For a restless generation of rock music consumers, exhausted by the implied tyranny of leather pants and unappealing loose women, Nirvana was an antidote. To fashion designers, Cobain was catnip, and was rock and roll’s own Kate Moss — delicate, waifish and impossible to look away from. It hardly mattered what he was wearing. It all came as a surprise, but it also all made too much sense.

As for Cobain and his own intentions, it remains difficult to say. He may have been vain, or he may have been too strung out to be vain. Certainly he was deeply invested in the mythology of rock and roll, perhaps tragically so. Either by happenstance or design, he has become one more iconic rock poster, along with Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, and Bob Marley. Like those forbearers in early tragedy, they’ve inspired no shortage of tributary crafts. Here’s a look at 10 of them.

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9. Nirvana Guitar T-Shirt Onesie/Swimsuit

Right, OK. So what we've got here is the repurposing of an old Nirvana T-shirt into a whole 'nother clothing item. We've seen this before, but never a silhouette quite like this. According to the seller, "TShreds," this erstwhile T-shirt of the body of a guitar with the Nirvana logo printed on it has been shredded into a form-fitting onesie/leotard/liner-free swimsuit (????!!!), complete with diamond cutaways on the sides and a revealing back. And despite all of these attributes and seeming endless possibilities for wearable moments, it seems sort of impractical, more fitting for the Sunset Strip than Sub Pop, unless you are Tawny Kitaen, in which case, you can probably work it anywhere.

8. Corgi Nevermind

So-called "dog people" have a perhaps not unfounded reputation of unbridled, maybe slightly weird zeal for their furry companions. The argument could be put forth though -- has been put forth, even -- that of all of the breeds out there in the world, Corgi owners are the most enthusiastic and passionate. And rightly so! Corgis are fucking adorable, especially when they are in costume. So all that said, cheers to the PaceCorg shop for replacing the iconic swimming baby chasing the dollar from the Nevermind cover with a charming Corgi! What was once a not unsubtle statement about an indie band "selling out" to a major becomes a totally cute image of a can-do pup in a hilarious underwater game of fetch. And you can has this painting for the low price of $145. What's not to love? Seriously, if you don't love this, you probably hate everything.

7. Purrvana Catnip Cassette Sachet

It probably bears mentioning that the one demographic that might be more surpassingly weird obsessive about their pets than dog people are cat people. And with good reason -- cats are colder and more unpredictable, moody, and insane than your average middle schooler, but they sure are pretty. And there are few things more sickeningly sweet than a basket full of kittens, save for maybe a basket full of puppies. Oh, all pets are great, who are we kidding! And by that measure, all rock and roll-inspired pet accessories are not just great, they are essential. Like this clever catnip sachet that looks like a cassette tape. It's funny, because they've changed the band name from Nirvana to "Purrvana" and instead of it containing music to nourish and sustain alienated teenage minds, it is filled with your kitty's favorite recreational substance. Because it's for cats, you see? It makes sense.

6. Beaded Friendship Bracelets

According to, "SinceIveBeenLovinU," the seller of these pretty, beaded friendship bracelets, "The concept of these bracelets is my take on the 'BEST FRIENDS' necklaces, where 1/2 the heart says BEST and the other 1/2 of the heart says FRIENDS. Each of these braclets [sic] wouldnt [sic] make sense if you read them alone, but when you put them together, they do... which translates to 'I don't make sense without my best friend.' You each wear 1/2, and put your wrists together to form a whole." This is a very nice idea, though it perhaps fails a bit at the conceptual level -- the words "Nirvana" and "Nevermind" actually make complete sense on their own, say if you're a Buddhist or, alternatively, just apathetic. But this doesn't make these particular bracelets something that every self-respecting Nirvana fan should not own. They could very easily be worn by just one person, one bracelet on each wrist, like Reverend Harry Powell's tattoos in Night Of The Hunted, or, just as easily, Uncle Leo's in "The Bookstore" episode from Seinfeld. When you think about it this way, friendship bracelets never seemed so fierce!

5. Nirvana Album Purse

First and foremost, this is an impressive item owing to the sheer amount of crafting going on here. This purse is hand quilted, using an old Nirvana T-shirt with the image of the band at its most energetic and exciting on one side, and a hand-embroidered patch of the Nirvana logo on the other. The entire thing is circular -- made to look like a record -- with hand-stitched grooves on both sides. It's awesome. That it's also sort of functional is just icing on the cake. While it might lack certain features of handbags that most of us have come to enjoy (pockets, zippers, etc.) it makes up for in being capacious and cool looking. You might not be able to find your wallet with ease, but who cares. It's kind of a perfect grunge "fuck you" to all of those record bags that were so ubiquitous on the shoulders of aspiring DJs in the '90s. This bag says, "Take your protective gatefold sleeves and shove it" without saying a word.

4. My Chemical Romance Meets Nirvana

In this delightful comic-book style fantasia, emo heroes My Chemical Romance meet up with Nirvana, resulting in awkward conversations and at least one instance of anonymous making out. Praise is in order for visual artist "petsymielle," who underplays typical music industry drama in favor of a much more likely sense of backstage tedium. The truth is, if My Chemical Romance had ever met up with Nirvana the outcome would likely have been boring on a scale that scientists have yet to invent a metric for. In this illustration, you get that sense and more. Under no other circumstances would you ever hear the words: "Oh man! I love your pants! Seriously!"

3. "Milk It" Portrait

Evidently inspired by the song "Milk It" off of In Utero, the artist known as "KozaGoatWorks" found himself driven by the muse to draw Cobain as an old-timey milkman. And as fan art goes, this is actually a pretty decent rendering of Cobain. And sure, with lyrics like "Look on the bright side, suicide/ Lost eyesight I'm on your side," and "Her milk is my shit/ my shit is her milk" the mind does kind of immediately go to images of a simpler America and the guy who drives around bringing wholesome milk to families every morning, no?

2. Cobain With Doll Heads

Provided Cobain's habitual fascination with newborns and infancy, this product makes a kind of rational sense. Looked at another way -- Jesus! Who in the hell would want to have this hanging in their living room?? What dangerous, addled soul might replace their Ikea-purchased Monet with this evil thing? In what might well qualify as the world's most terrifying conversation piece, three lifeless, disembodied dolls hover near the familiar blue-eyed countenance of our disturbed singer. It all looks like the preview of a grindhouse horror picture. What will the dolls do to Kurt? And how will he reciprocate?? This is probably going to wind up like something out of a Melvins song...

1. Lovely Kitten vs. Nirvana "Love Gun" Guitar Pick

Huh. Hm. OK, well earlier we stipulated that cat people are pretty nuts, but this is just next-level strange. It is a guitar pick, manufactured in Budapest and reportedly "tested by the Eastern Block Art Community." On one side, there is an image of one of children's author Richard Scarry's signature cartoon kittens, wearing a fine necktie. There is what appears to be another, larger animal (a bear? Another cat?) behind the kitten, wearing what seems to be a robe -- it's hard to tell, whatever, it doesn't matter, it's all great. Then you flip the pick over, and there are the lyrics to KISS's seminal romantic anthem "Love Gun." Awesome. Got it. Guitar pick. Cartoon cats on one side, KISS lyrics on the other. Where do I type in my credit card number? But then you read the description as penned by "NUNIWOOD" shop owner, that this was "inspired by Kurt Cobain." So… how possible? Why? Darker imaginations run to the notion that perhaps in present day Hungary music fans and craftspeople alike conflate Cobain with this KISS song in really lurid ways because of his unfortunate end. Or maybe they just think that he was a huge KISS fan, his death notwithstanding. Or do they just think that "Love Gun" is a Nirvana song? (Confusing it perhaps with "Love Buzz"?) The mind reels. What would Paul Stanley say?

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