Who Should Play Maverick Jr. In Top Gun 2?

[Originally posted on October 17, 2011.]

It’s 2011, so the time has FINALLY come for a Top Gun sequel. “We’re ready now.” – America. If Hollywood had tried to make a Top Gun sequel any earlier, even in say 2009, for example, the front page headlines would have screamed TOO SOON! But now it is time. All of the planets are aligned. It just feels right. From /Film:

Yep, the sequel/follow-up to Top Gun is still happening. Ashley Miller and Zack Stentz, who were jointly responsible for one of the middle drafts of X-Men: First Class, are in talks to write Top Gun 2 (or whatever it will eventually be called) for Paramount and David Ellison’s Skydance Productions.

Oooh! The writers jointly responsible for one of the middle drafts of X-Men: First Class?! Is anyone worried that this movie is going to be TOO good? Also this quote form Tony Scott:

It’s not even a reinvention, it’s not even a sequel. It’s a re-thinking. What inspired me is that the world today is great, it’s so different from the world we touched originally. It’s really run by guys sitting in Nevada on computers playing war games. So it’s a mixture of that, and it’s the end of the generation of fighter pilots. Not in a complete end to the generation, because these guys they go up in F-35s and they carry 10 drones with them. [But] it’s a very different movie.

Sick. Love it. Already have a reservation at Ink World to get a Top Gun 2 tattoo on my FACE. There aren’t any “OFFICIAL” plot details at the moment, but I think it’s pretty safe to say that Top Gun 2 will center around Maverick Jr., a six-month-old baby raised in the United States Air Force’s top secret Super Baby Soldiers program and trained from a very early age (even earlier than six-months!) to be a killing machine. The only question now is WHO WILL PLAY MAVERICK JR.? Here are some casting suggestions:

This baby: Casting this baby as Maverick Jr. might be playing it too safe for some people who would like to see the franchise take this opportunity to really reinvent itself. But there’s also something to be said for giving fans what they want and what they want is a classic American fighter pilot baby. In that case, this is your pre-man.

This baby: You might be looking at this baby and thinking, “Sure, as Goose Jr. maybe. But Maverick Jr.? Get real!” Fair point, but use your imagination! A funny, stupid baby would be an unexpected curveball and might be just what Top Gun 2 needs to bring in a whole new generation of infantile (literally) fans.

This baby: You probably don’t recognize this little baby because he doesn’t have any credits yet, but as Steven Soderbergh and Luchino Visconti already know, sometimes you can get very interesting results by casting non-actors in movie roles. It is called neo-realism and it has something to do with Mussolini. (Could be fun if the Top Gun supersoldier babies enter a wormhole and have to use a B2 bomber against Mussolini? Explore later.)

This baby: To be completely honest, I’m not sure if America is ready for a black Maverick Jr. The only reason I say this is because if you do a Google image search for “baby,” you will basically only find white babies. OBVIOUSLY. To get a picture of this baby you have to Google image search “black baby.” Cool Google image search. Do NOT delete Internet history. I’m not saying this black baby wouldn’t totally knock Maverick Jr. out of the park, I’m just saying we might have to wait another 30 years for the next reboot of Top Gun 2 before all the racist audiences will have died off in the upcoming Pepsi Race Wars.

This baby: This baby would bring the same smoldering sex appeal to the role that Tom Cruise brought to the original. We just have to decide if we want a sexy baby or not. We might! It’s at least worth a discussion. Throw him on the pile.

This baby: This baby probably plays too smart for the Top Gun 2 audience. Maverick Jr. is supposed to be a genius because of the Nuclear Mitochondrian Serum injected directly into his brain stem, NOT because he’s an actual nerd. This baby would probably be better suited to the lead role in the reboot of Revenge of the Nerds in which a group of supersoldier babies have to infiltrate the Phi Kappas and foil their terrorist plot to ruin Homecoming.

We better line up now for this movie because of how good it’s going to be. TEAM BABIES!