Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Top Comments

You guys OK? Should we do a quick head count? Seemed like people were kind of quiet this week. You didn’t even let your voices be heard at the ballot box. The highest upvote was, like, 20. I know June Gloom is tough, sometimes the sun doesn’t come out until almost 10:30 in the morning, so for a little while it isn’t sunny, and you are like how hard can life get? But you guys have to hang in there! Teenage suicide don’t do it! I called all the hospitals, though, and they haven’t heard of you guys, so now I’m just sitting at home getting more and more worried. Wringing my hands. Sweating buckets. Could someone please just call or text or SEXT or comment and let me know that you are OK? How am I supposed to enjoy my barbecue at sweet summer vibes this weekend if I’m worried sick that you’re dead, or worse, commenting on a different website?! LOL. JK. Life is short. I hope you are at least having fun, you MONSTERS.

After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, the winner of the Bill Nye At The Man Of Steel Premiere Caption Contest, and the Editor’s and Associate Editor’s Choices.

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments

#5 specialk | Jun 7th Score:18
I would slap all the men who sat with their legs wide like they were delivering babies.
Posted in: Are You Doing Anything Special For The Purge This Year?!
#4 athieno | Jun 7th Score:18
I work at a job where I’m forced to ask people to turn down their headphones several times a day (public library, y’all, living the dream), and so I have become all-to-comfortable doing this on the T. I forget the my face of professionalism and civil acceptance mean NOTHING to the people on the T (it barely means anything to the people in the library). I have caused a little trouble for myself, but have also become a folk hero to other T riders.
Posted in: Are You Doing Anything Special For The Purge This Year?!
#3 topknot | Jun 12th Score:18
She was all that the whole time.
Posted in: How Was Everyone’s Day Today?
#2 R2D2, Esq. | Jun 13th Score:18
Just tried reading this comment – written by a moron, really boring. Writer has the mind of a very dumb and backward child. Sorry LBT!
Posted in: Donald Trump Does Not Like Modern Family
#1 thisisawkward | Jun 13th Score:20
MySpace still thinks MySpace is a thing
Posted in: This Is Just A Good Ad For MySpace

[Assoc. Ed. Note: Congratulations! I hope this helps out will all of your June Gloom, guys! There’s something to feel happy about, at least for the five of you!]

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

#1 manners | Jun 12th Score:-4
Hate to do this but… “Anyways” is not a word. Don’t ban me from the site, Gabe. DON’T DO IT! I HAVE SO MUCH TO OFFER! For instance: my knowledge of the non-word, “anyways.”
Posted in: The Thing About Making TV Shows Based On Twitter

[Assoc. Ed. Note: You’re not banned! Anyways, we all have opinions.]

This Week’s Caption Contest Winner

catweazle | Jun 11th Score:6
Finally, a man of science! Surely he can explain what happened to Superman’s underpants.
Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption it? Contest: Bill Nye At The Man Of Steel Premiere

[Assoc. Ed. Note: Congratulations, catweazle! You earned it.]

This Week’s Associate Editor’s Choice

  capsulekei | Jun 13th Score:11

In seriousness, I do actually think it’s important to bring up her role on Gilmore Girls if you’re discussing weight/body image brought up through her in her roles or her performance of those roles. As far as I can tell, Gilmore Girls definitely is her only significant role that never, ever, brought up her weight or played into stereotypes about overweight people. Her character is career driven, feminine, sweet, goofy, and even deeply romantic, who gets a typically feminine happy ending.

That’s SO RARE.

If some reviewer is going to try and imply she just cashes in off her “Chris Farley” style physicality of a ‘fat person’ to make her name, conveniently leaving out a TV role she played for seven years is pretty significant.

Everyone with a brain can also figure out it’s going to be hard to find roles where she wouldn’t be asked to play up some vicious stereotype about overweight women/people. Then she get to contend with the inevitability that anything she does will represent how overweight women in general are portrayed just because there are so few in popular media in general. So even if she, the writers, the director, everyone in involved has worked hard to not have her character fall into some endless fat joke cycle, just by being over the top, good at physical comedy, or just simply play a non-traditionally feminine, lady, she’s going to be accused of playing into stereotypes.

Ug sorry all, this post is too serious and full of my smad (sad+mad) feelings.

In conclusion,
That Rex Reed is a real butt.

Posted in: A Friendly Chat With Gabe And Kelly: Melissa McCarthy’s New York Times Profile

[Assoc. Ed. Note: Gilmore Girls, you guys. For real.]

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

martinmegs | Jun 12th Score:13
But does he know the Pythagorean theorem?
Posted in: Duh Aficionado Magazine: Ethan Embry Knows What Can’t Hardly Wait Is About!

[Ed. Note: Kaboom.]