Your Dream Celebrity Wedding Officiant

This is a place for friends. It’s like the gym from the commercials where the tagline is something like, “This is a gym for people who hate rude people at gyms, like people who stand in the mirror and talk about their bodies — come to this one.” There is no shame here! We are free to discuss everything we think about constantly, ESPECIALLY which celebrity we would pick if we could pick one celebrity to officiate our weddings. Get it off of your chest! We even have a solid lead-in, from EW, via FilmDrunk:

Sir Ian McKellen will officiate at the upcoming wedding of Sir Patrick Stewart and his fiancée, 35-year-old jazz singer Sunny Ozell. When the topic of X-Men: Days of Future Past came up during McKellen’s appearance on U.K. program The Jonathan Ross Show this weekend, the English actor announced, “I’m going to marry Patrick,” provoking some fits of laughter from the audience before he clarified, “How else do you put that? I’m going to officiate at his wedding.”

SIR IAN MCKELLEN, NOT A BAD CHOICE! (Also: SIR IAN MCKELLEN, NOT A GOOD JOKE!) That would not be my first choice, but to each celebrity his own celebrity. My first choice would be George Clooney, obviously. After that my choices would be: Steve-O, Andy Milonakis, Borat, David Bowie, NOT VINCENT GALLO — not on my wedding day, and Martin Freeman. And Martin Short. Martin Short would actually be my second choice after George Clooney. Also Barack Obama. Only men?! All of those men and also Jenny Slate. Haha. Ok, who’s on your list?! Just copy and paste from your Celebrity Wedding Officiant spreadsheet, we’re not fancy here.