Katherine Chloe Cahoon(s) For Oscar Host 2014

“She spoke so slowly, yet we couldn’t comprehend anything she said.” “She knew a few facts about what movies came from which studios. I mean, they both did!” “It was fun to see how impressed the ‘smart’ Cahoon was when the ‘dressy’ Cahoon was able to rattle off some of the gifts available at the gift lounge without the use of a teleprompter. And here we thought she was only an expert in love and glamor.” “Honestly, though: What is with her vocal cadence? Like she’s reading a list of words to a traumatized child.” “This was great. Much improved from last year, seriously.” “What is Katherine Chloe Cahoon?” All pre-quotes from when Katherine Chloe Cahoon and dark-hair-glasses Katherine Chloe Cahoon host the 2014 Oscars together. The future’s so bright it graduated in the top 7.34% of its class at Vanderbilt, but who’s calculating! (Thanks for the tip, Christopher.)