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Duh Aficionado Magazine: Reality Television Is Fake

BREAKING NEWS, GUYS! APPARENTLY SOME OF THE THINGS THAT HAPPEN ON REALITY TELEVISION ARE PRE-DETERMINED BY A GROUP OF “PRODUCERS” AND ARE NOT SIMPLY THE RESULT OF A LONE CAMERA MAN FOLLOWING AROUND A GROUP OF NORMAL AMERICANS WITH LOTS OF INTEGRITY!!!!!! Variety HAS THE SCOOP:

TLC has found itself in hot water over allegations that its latest reality skein, “Breaking Amish,” may be a fraud. Program, which bowed Sept. 9, follows five Amish and Mennonite young adults as they leave their isolated communities for the Big Apple. “Breaking Amish” has drawn strong ratings, averaging 3 million viewers for its two Sunday 10 p.m. airings to date. Its debut was the most-watched series bow for TLC in three years, even topping that of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.”

Reports have surfaced, however, claiming that cast members from the show had not only left the Amish/Mennonite community years ago but have been married, had kids and been divorced. Old photos from social media sites like MySpace and Facebook showing cast members in modern clothes have circulated on the Internet, arousing suspicion from viewers and putting TLC and the skein’s production company, Hot Snakes Media, on the defensive.

In a joint statement TLC and Hot Snakes said: “There is a lot of information floating around about the group featured on ‘Breaking Amish.’ Much of it is not true, but some of it is — and is addressed in upcoming episodes.”

Crazy to think that the network that created the monsters Jon Gosselin and Kate Gosselin, and which is currently running shows SIMULTANEOUSLY that feature dwarf security guards, an outlandish family of redneck cartoons, and two conjoined twins going to college or whatever the fuck, and who just announced today that they are releasing a special about a 1,100 pound woman, would ever stoop so low as to find some Mennonites who had already left the church to be on their show about Mennonites leaving the church. WHO ARE WE EVEN SUPPOSED TO TRUST WHEN IT COMES TO WATCHING THESE RIDICULOUS SHOWS?! This is going to be pretty rough for TLC when they lose the one viewer who wasn’t already pretty aware of the situation and still gives a shit about anything.