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Who Should Play Alf In The Alf Movie?

Hollywood is now developing a live-action/animation hybrid Alf reboot movie. The working title is No Duh, Of Course. It’s going to be so great. America’s teens are like “Oh man, I’m going to sell my skateboard for a ticket to this movie I can’t wait to see it. Let’s eat Pop Rocks and listen to the hits on the radio!” America’s youth already cannot get enough of the new Alf movie! #ALF is trending worldwide on Twitter and he is everyone’s MySpace Top 8. But the question that remains is who should play him? If you really want to get the kids to the theater, you’re going to go with someone like Jaden Smith probably. But then again, this is nostalgia bait for an aging part of the population, so maybe someone like Mark Paul Gosselar would be better? Then again, that’s a little silly, and what people go for these days is darkness, gritty reality. If you want to do for Alf what Christopher Nolan did for the Batman franchise, then I think you’re going to go with someone a little stronger, like maybe a Dame Jeremy Renner. Then again, Paul Giamatti would really bring out the comedy in the neurotic alien. (I cannot remember if Alf is neurotic or not, but let’s just say that he is because none of this is real.) Or you get one of these new hunks, a Liam Hemsworth, a Taylor Lautner, a Jared Leto, and you make Alf more fuckable. Now he’s an international sex symbol. He eats cats, GET IT? Gross! Who should play Alf? How about McCauley Culkin? I feel like he’s kind of a sad case these days. Let’s bring him back the way Quentin Tarantino brought back John Travolta. Seems like no one has thanked him for that in awhile, by the way. Thanks, man!