PUNK’D Is OUR Generation’s PUNK’D

Barkeep, a round of fistbumps for all my bros! This looks great, huh? So fun. I can’t wait to see the one bored multi-millionaire momentarily alleviate the boredom of another bored millionaire on TV. “It was almost like something meaningful and emotionally affecting happened in our lives. Now let’s go spend $15,000 on a dinner we’re not even hungry for and fuck something.” This show is basically a documentary about how famous people are assholes, right? I mean, by all accounts this is going to be the most EXPLOSIVE season of PUNK’D yet, where people are supposed to honestly think they are responsible for the incredible destruction of private property and SETTING HUMAN BEINGS ON FIRE, but their reaction is just to jump around and giggle? Fuck. My favorite part of this trailer, though, is when Justin Bieber says that if Taylor Swift thinks that she blew something up and ruined a wedding she’ll freak out. Yeah. No, totally. That’s so Taylor. It’s crazy how worked up she gets about BLOWING STUFF UP AND RUINING WEDDINGS. The rest of us are just like, what? Was I not supposed to blow that thing up and ruin that wedding? Well you should have told me that ahead of time. I can’t be bothered to feel bad about what’s basically a breakdown in communication on your part. GROW UP, TAYLOR SWIFT.

My DVR is so wet right now. (Gross. Sorry. Gotcha!)