The Atlanta Braves Are Disputing Pixar’s Brave Trademark, DUH

Let me start off with a question. What do you think of when you think of the word “brave”? Let me finish off that question with an answer: The Atlanta Braves. So it follows that we were all a little confused to hear that Pixar titled their upcoming movie Brave. “Oh, like the baseball team?” asked every movie blog. “FINALLY, a Pixar movie about the Atlanta Braves,” we all said in emails to each other. But, no — We soon learned it had nothing at all to do with the Atlanta Braves and were sorely disappointed. Luckily today brought the good news that the Braves and trying to put an end to the confusion by filing an objection to Pixar’s trademark blah blah, etc. From SlashFilm:

This news comes from the trusted Disney news source Stitch Kingdom, whose report states though trademarks differentiate between the singular and plural use of a word, the Atlanta National League Baseball Club, who own the Braves, believe “that damages will occur as a result of Disney’s trademarks being approved as they have used the singular form before on merchandise and insist it is common for fans, media, et. al. to use the singular form when referring to a single player, whereas the pluralized form refers to the entire team.”

ORDER IN THE COURT! It must be difficult, I’m sure, to be surrounded by the word “brave” all day when, to you, it refers to your baseball team. Like if Pixar called their movie Videogum. Of course we would think that to most people there’d be an implication of our Videogum, when probably they would just be referring to one of the more common definitions. That being said, though, DAMAGES will occur? What type of damages could they possibly be worried about? Well, ok, actually I can think of some. My guesses on damages they could possibly be worried about after the jump. 

–The movie is released and it is bad. Then when they have to play other teams in baseball, the other teams are like, “Oh, we’re playing the Atlanta Braves? Like that bad movie? Hahahaha.” And then the other teams are very confident and the Atlanta Braves always lose.

–The movie is released and it is good, but TOO hartwarming. And then when they play other teams the other teams are like, “Aw, jeeze, we can’t play the Brave. Do you remember what happened at the end? We forfeit.” And then they never get to play a game and it’s like, Why are they even a team? And then the team disassembles.

–People buy Brave merchandise instead of Atlanta Braves merchandise to show they are a fan of the Atlanta Braves, but literally NO ONE draws that conclusion, and then it’s like, do the Atlanta Braves have any fans? I don’t see anyone here wearing any Atlanta Braves merch. But there sure do seem to be a lot of Pixar fans for some reason.

–The team members get confused all the time as to whether they’re on the team or in the movie and they stop playing baseball and only seek out wonder and awe.

–Everybody goes to see the movie instead of the baseball game because they were confused about the name, and then they realize, hey, this is MUCH more entertaining than a baseball game! And then no one cares about baseball anymore.

And on and on, I’m sure. I guess the Atlanta Braves have a point! Sorry, Pixar, YOU LOSE! Strike three! Play ball! TOUCHDOWNNNNNNNNN!