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WHO POOPED AND PEED ON THE BANK?!

While we still do not know WHO POOPED AND PEED ON THE BANK, I think one thing we can agree is that everyone in this “news” clip is a real TREAT. Especially the “reporter.” Look, it is completely reasonable for someone to feel like they don’t understand the point of the Occupy Wall Street movement. I’m not even sure the Occupy Wall Street movement entirely understands the point of the Occupy Wall Street movement. (Note: This is the movement’s Eureka, CA, branch.) And the dude in the red fleece who won’t stop saying that the banks “poo on us every day” is not someone I would want to have a genuine conversation with about anything other than bargain-priced outerwear. But this lady with her microphone is so rude and aggressive and mean! Why you gotta be that way? I know she wants the truth (should have worn a grapes costume) and we ALL want to know WHO POOPED AND PEED ON THE BANK, but, and I’m not a professional journalist like she is, but do you really think we’re going to find out WHO POOPED AND PEED ON THE BANK just by walking around asking people directly (and sardonically) WHO POOPED AND PEED ON THE BANK and hoping someone just up and confesses? To pooping and peeing on a bank? And I’m sorry that Harry and the Hendersons pushed your camera, but do you really need the word “ASSAULT” right in the title of this video? You know that human beings are actually assaulted sometimes and it’s terrible, right? (Meanwhile, the way the unseen woman in the background giggles “well, the police are on their way” like she is trying out for voiceover work in the Mean Girls Nintendo DS Lite game makes me want to POOP AND PEE ON HER FACE.) She does have a point, though, when she says “You guys wanted us to do news on you, and now we are doing news.” Hahha. Yeah, no, this is definitely news. WE WILL CONTINUE TO FOLLOW THE STORY OF WHO POOPED AND PEED ON THE BANK UNTIL WE GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS IMPORTANT NEWS. (Via Gawker.)