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How Psyched Are You For The 3D Popeye Movie?

Good GREAT news! Ok, actually, maybe you should guess what the news is before I tell you. It has to do with a movie. Ok, fine — A movie that’s going to be made. Ok. You have one guess. What? What did you–Oh, YES, YOU GOT IT! Jay Scherick and David Ronn, the writing team behind The Smurfs, are going to be writing the screenplay for Sony’s future 3D animated Popeye reboot! You are sooooo good at guessing OMG I can’t even believe it. Probably you were able to guess it right away because it’s something you’ve wanted for a really long time? Ever since The Smurfs came out and the integrity of the series was so well preserved, while still being gently updated for a younger audience who may not have ever even heard of The Smurfs before seeing the movie? And you were like, “Man, I wish they’d do the same for poor old Popeye.”? I knew it! I knew that’s what you thought. Now who’s good at guessing?! Well, luckily for you, Sony president Bob Osher felt the same way. From Deadline:

“Scherick & Ronn have a remarkable talent in re-energizing beloved characters,” said Sony Pictures Digital Productions president Bob Osher. “As they demonstrated with The Smurfs, they embrace the iconic characteristics of these timeless characters and craft a story that really engages moviegoers today.”

All the old characters must be sooo glad that every single one of them is being re-energized these days. “I can’t wait for my turn!” -Pepper Ann. But how are Scherick and Ronn going to engage today’s moviegoers? Today’s moviegoers are a PRETTY tough crowd and Popeye is a PRETTY old and boring cartoon that none of them are going to care about until some updated stuff is sloppily thrown at it. So. How are they going to do it?! My guesses:

  • H. Jon Benjamin is Popeye.
  • “Spinach” is just an app on Popeye’s iPhone 6.
  • Olive Oyl rides a hoverboard and has purple spiky hair.
  • Bluto is a mean gossip blogger and spreads a rumor online that Olive Oyl is pregnant.
  • Ham Gravy creates a social networking website called GravyBook and makes a zillion dollars.
  • Lots of jokes about what, exactly, Popeye HAS in that pipe.
  • Everybody has a robot voice sometimes.

And all of that in 3D? I can hardly wait! Ahh, if only every movie could be a 3D reboot of a comic from the early 1900s.