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Breaking Bad S04E06: Did Friggen Shakespeare Write This Episode?

This week’s episode, to begin here with a broad statement, showed a few of the characters finally coming to their senses. Finally. They have all been so far away from their senses for so long it seemed like they may never find them again. But Jesse and Skyler, at least, seem to be gaining self-awareness — at least more than they’ve had recently. “Skyler is online.” Right? Get it? Skynet? Yes. Walt? Well. Walt is still pretty much a dummy. But remember that monologue he gave? OMG! But, ok, we’ll get to that soon enough. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. This episode opens, once again, in an ice truck. “And it allll starts overrrr againnnnn.” But this time instead of seeing Mike’s breath, we see two guys we don’t know’s breath — two of Gus’s guys who we don’t need to know because then they die right away. Whoops! And they die at the hands of three handsome young men, who reroute the truck’s exhaust fumes right back into the truck.

DEATH AND METH THEFT HAVE NEVER BEEN SO HANDSOME! So, they kill Gus’s thug guys, enter the truck, and steal a bucket of blue meth. They are young, inventive, and handsome, and the audience is on their side immediately. JK. (Kind of.) I’m pretty sure we do not know who they’re working with at this point. I think I would remember handsome people from previous episodes and I do NOT remember these handsome people. So yeah. They take the meth and then: “Boowww neeearr nawww — chicha chichichic.” Opening theme.

Meanwhile, Walt wakes up very late in the day in Skyler’s bed. He’s groggy and is acting like he doesn’t really remember what happened last night (at Hank and Marie’s, where he told Hank to keep looking for Heisenberg) because he had “too much wine.” Give me a break, Walt. We all know that you have to drink A LOT of wine to not remember what happened the last night and I’m pretty sure you drank, at the very most, 3/4ths of one bottle of wine. You’re a grown man. You can handle 3/4ths of one bottle of wine. But in any case, Skyler says she was up all night wondering whyTF he would have said such a stupid thing to Hank. YEAH, US TOO! She thinks the answering machine message was a goodbye (which is sad!) and that everything he said at dinner was a cry for help, because if he got caught it would at least all be over. YEAH, I THOUGHT THAT TOO! She tells him that he’s not some hardened criminal and that he’s in over his head, and asks if what happened to Gale could happen to him. She wants to go to the police. She keeps pressing. And then. WALT GAVE HIS SHORT MONOLOGUE THAT WAS SO GOOD! He is not in danger, he explains. He IS the danger.

A guy opens his door and gets shot and you think that of me? No. I am the one who KNOCKS.

Ahhhh! That was so great. “Yeah, I thought what Walt said was really great until Kelly/the entire Internet got too excited about it and ruined it.” — Maybe what everyone is thinking. But. That was great. “You think that of me?” Very good. But also:

Walt, you’re a dummy. That was a great speech you just gave to Skyler, but Skyler is pretty much right and you are pretty much wrong. I know that Walt has killed people and has had people killed and has secured his and Jesse’s life, for now, but how long does he think that’s really going to last? He ISN’T a hardened criminal. He’s only been in the meth game for a few months, and Gus’s life would certainly be much easier without him. His life is very much in danger — and the lives of his family. He’s the one who knocks sometimes but also he is a target for the knocking. But, anyway, he gives Skyler the teeth face:

And the teeth face combined with the knocking speech scare Skyler:

So she takes baby and leaves for most of the episode.

Following his teeth face speech, Walt leaves to get the carwash keys from Bogdan, who gives him a big long lecture about being a meth boss I MEAN A CARWASH BOSS:

You’ll learn. Being in charge is not easy. It takes hard work. … The real important thing, and not everyone knows this, is to be tough. The boss has to be tough. Has to say no to people. Has to make cashiers wipe down cars, even if they don’t want to. Can you be tough, Walter?

This was a bit weird. “Why so serious,” Bodgan? Whyyy sooo serriiiouuuss? Because you watch this show too? Because you know that Walt needed to hear a speech about how he has to be tough in his world of meth, thinly veiled as a speech about how he has to be tough in his new position as carwash owner? Whatever, who cares. This was a good scene. Very intense.

Then Bogdan tries to take his first-dollar-in-a-frame from the wall and Walt makes him give it back to him, because he promised the carwash “as is.” Then he buys a soda with the dollar. YOU ARE A JERK, WALT! “Whoops, should’ve saved the tough speech ’til AFTER I took the dollar.” -Bogdan in his mind, I’m sure. And then there’s a shot that looks like that painting by that guy. You know what I mean. That famous one:

This one:

Right? Doesn’t it kind of look like that? Whatever, shut up.

Meanwhile, SPEAKING OF DINERS, Mike is with Jesse at a diner. It is apparent that Mike is Jesse’s new dad. Jesse’s drinking a coffee and Mike notices that his hand is really shaky. “You ok there?” Mike asks. “I’M FINE,” responds Jesse, because he is an angsty teen. Then he begins, “Not using is…,” and trails off. Mike offers him some food and Jesse eats it with an upset and disgusted face because, again, he is just full to the brim with angst. Mike gets a call and then leaves, telling Jesse that, no doy, he does NOT need his help.

The next day, at the breakfast table, Walt tells Walt Jr. that what he is suffering from (“gambling addiction”) is not a disease, and that what is going on with him is about choices — choices that he stands by. Uh, Walt? HOW ABOUT JUST PRETEND THAT WHAT YOU HAVE IS A GAMBLING DISEASE TO YOUR SON. What the F are you trying to prove? You’re only being very confusing. Stop being so stupid. I hate you. Then he takes Walt Jr. to buy a car:

Oy yoy yoy.

Back at the lab, Walt asks Jesse for an update on his field trips with Mike and they basically have the same conversation they had last episode. Jesse tells Walt that he’s with Mike for backup — a second set of eyes — and Walt tries to make him see that he doesn’t mean anything to these people. “They’re not your real dads! I’m your real dad!” But then Jesse explains to him that he understands what’s going on — that it started out as Mike babysitting him so he doesn’t use, because they can’t kill him and that’s the next best thing. BUT. Then he saved Mike from getting robbed (“even killed maybe”), so now maybe he’s “not such a loser after all.” Wah-wah. I really thought he was getting it for a minute! And he was! But then he lost it. But then Walt gets it, and explains that he thinks the robbery was a set up and that Gus is trying to drive a wedge in between them. That makes sense! Then Walt says, “It’s all about me.” Hahah. Walt! Did you REALLY have to say “It’s all about me”? Breaking Bad IS Mean Girls.

So, they’re working in the lab and Jesse gets a call from Mike and says he has to go, leaving Walt to clean up by himself. OR DOES HE? HAVE TO CLEAN UP BY HIMSELF?

Nope! He pays three ladies from the Clean Sheets Factory they share their space with to clean his meth lab for him. Good thinking. He is very satisfied. But then when they’re finished, Tyrus (WHICH IS THE NEW GUS GUY’S NAME, I FINALLY KNOW IT) puts them on a bus back to Honduras. Hahah. WHOOPS AGAIN. Walt you are a dummy and now these three ladies do not get to live in America anymore. Walt tells Tyrus that this was his idea and asks him not to punish them for it, and to tell Gus to blame him and not them. “He does.” YIKES!

So, meanwhile, Skyler is at The Four Corners. The place where four states meet. These states:

She flips a coin twice and it lands on New Mexico twice. Well? I guess you have to keep living in New Mexico now? Or something? She flips a coin and it doesn’t land in New Mexico and she slides it over to New Mexico with her foot, which makes even LESS sense than the mistake I wrote originally. Why even go there if you aren’t even going to LISTEN to the coin god?! What is the deal with this. What is going on here. Someone tell me. Skyler, call me. You just wasted a lot of time and gas.

Meanwhile, Mike and Jesse are staking out the house of the guys who have their bucket of meth from the beginning of the episode. Not the handsome guys, unfortunately, but two very UNhandsome guys who they gave it to. Mike tells Jesse that they’re selling meth they stole, and that now they’re just going to sit in the car, watch and wait. Because meth-heads are unpredictable and Mike doesn’t LIKE unpredictable. But, as we’ve learned in past episodes, Jesse doesn’t like BEING BORED. So he goes in.

His first attempt — trying to buy from them — doesn’t work, so he gets a shovel from the back of Mike’s car, then there’s a very weird shovel POV shot:

And then he starts digging in their front lawn. The guy (Tucker. TUCKER! TUCKER!) comes outside and asks why he’s digging. “You know why,” Jesse says. Hahah. Then he gets Tucker to take over for a minute, then he asks to use Tucker’s bathroom, and then he’s inside the house. Mike is proud of how well Jesse can toy with meth addicts:

But once Jesse’s in the house he encounters a whole OTHER set of problems, centered around the absolutely crazy meth head guy who lives there and who has a shotgun. He screams crazy stuff about how he doesn’t have enough meth to sell and he points the shotgun at Jesse. The scene is broken by Mike coming in the back door, giving Jesse a moment to hit the meth guy over the head and take his shot gun. Then Mike notices what is written on the top of the meth bucket:

Later, at a diner with Gus, Mike explains that this says “Ready to talk?” Which is good because I do not know Spanish. Gus tells him to set up a meeting with these handsome guys and see what they have to say, then he asks how Jesse, who is waiting outside of the diner, did that day. As Gus exists the diner, he tells Jesse that he hears he can handle himself. “Why me?” Jesse asks. “I like to think I see things in people,” responds Gus. “THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID,” says Kelly.

In the final scene of the episode, Skyler returns home and sees Walt Jr.’s new car. She acts like she fine with it, and Walt Jr. leaves to drive it around the block a few times. After he’s gone, Skyler explains to Walt, once again, that he is a dummy. Obviously they can’t be seen buying this insane vehicle — they have to stick to their story. “It goes back. Tomorrow,” she says. Walt tells her that he’s worried Walt Jr. will blame her for this and then Skyler has her own great little speech:

Oh, he will. Once again he’ll blame his bitch mother for taking away something that his loving father has given him. But you know, Walt…someone has to protect this family from the man who protects this family.

BOOM. Then Skyler dropped the mic and the end credits rolled.

This was a great episode. I don’t care what anyone says, though I’m sure everyone will agree, so whatever it doesn’t matter if I care or not. Walt continuing to not understand his place in all of this is getting a bit frustrating, though. I hope he wises up soon, but I fear he will not wise up for a long time. Oh well. “What did you think about this episode?” SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!