The New Bewitched Is OUR Generation’s Bewitched

The Hollywood Reporter is Hollywood reporting today that CBS has ordered a script for an updated take on the classic sitcom, Bewitched.

[CBS] has ordered a script from Sony Pictures Television for a potential remake of Bewitched.

The script order for Bewitched joins a growing number of classic TV series returning back to the small screen. ABC’s Charlie’s Angels – also from Sony Pictures Television — will premiere in September, and CBS’ Hawaii Five-O returns for its second season in the fall.

Bewitched ran for eight seasons on ABC, from 1964 to 1972 and starred Elizabeth Montgomery as Samantha, a witch who marries Darrin, a mortal (Dick York and later Dick Sargent), and attempts to become a typical suburban housewife.

Sure. I mean, sure. Yes. Here’s a conversation about this:

Person 1: They’re remaking Bewitched.
Person 2: Is there a German word for “totally not even a little bit surprised.”

Here’s another:

Person 1: They’re remaking Bewitched.
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: Oh, you already heard?
Person 2: No, but I mean, you know. Right.

Of course, we can’t just remake Bewitched without bringing it up to date 4 today’s youths. LET’S GET READY TO ROCK! (Haha. Gross. LET’S GET IT FUNKAY!) (HAHAHAH IT IS GETTING WORSE NOW!)

  • Samantha is a 17-year-old high school junior and she uses her powers to get on the a capella team.
  • Darrin is a vampire. And a werewolf. New creature hybrid.
  • Instead of a broomstick, Samantha rides around on a flying RAZOR SCOOTER.
  • In the updated version, Darrin is still an advertising executive but his last name is Draper.
  • Samantha and Darrin can’t get married because of President Michele Bachmann. Samantha becomes a crusader for witch equality.
  • The opening theme song is performed by Matisyahu. So hot right now.
  • At dinner parties, Samantha doesn’t create an incredible meal with a snap of her fingers and then remove all of the dirty dishes afterwards with another snap of her fingers, because she believes that Darrin should share some of the household responsibilities. She read about it in Mother Jones
  • .

  • Everyone is a hologram and the show takes place on a spacestation.

I can’t wait for this awesome new show. It is going to very hip and funky cool.