Today We Say Goodbye To Copper Cab

Late last week, Copper Cab posted a new video (after the jump) and it’s just Classic Cab. He yells a lot! About the haters! Even more Classic Cab of him, he makes very complicated and confusing arguments that sound vaguely threatening and maybe racist. Like, in this new video, he talks about how people need to stop leaving negative comments on his YouTube page because it’s illegal? And at first you are like, well, no, that’s definitely not true. And then he goes on to explain that he gets so many negative comments that some of the “haters” (his word) must be from other countries. Holmes. Copper Holmes. ERGO, if they are from other countries then they don’t have freedom of speech. Oh brother. What? So, in conclusion, your honor, if you are from a foreign country don’t leave negative comments on Copper Cab’s YouTube page because you will go to the jail from Brokedown Palace. Probably. Look it up. Look up laws, crimes, international justice, and Claire Danes. Then, Copper Cab starts complaining about people leaving negative comments on his old videos. “Those are so old,” he points out. Because if there is one thing about Copper Cab it is that he is always moving forward and looking ahead. The rolling stone gathers no HATERS. He points out that the original video that got him so many haters in the first place, Gingers Do Have Souls, is a year old. Whoa! That IS old. Except it’s not a year old. It’s a YEAR AND A HALF old. That is too old. Enough. Today we must say goodbye to Copper Cab. Let us give him a Viking Funeral, by setting the Internet on fire and shoving it out to sea.

One last Copper Cab rant, and then let each of us grab a handful of e-dirt and toss it into the iGrave.

Goodbye, Copper Cab!

Good luck and godspeed, (14-year-)old friend.