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OK, THIS TIME THE ROBOT UPRISING HAS DEFINITELY BEGUN PROBABLY FOR SURE

ATTENTION ALL HUMANS! WE KNOW THAT WE HAVE RAISED SOME FALSE ALARMS IN THE PAST, BUT WE ARE QUITE SURE THIS TIME THAT THE ROBOT UPRISING HAS INDEED BEGUN. AFTER THE JUMP WE HAVE POSTED CONCLUSIVE EVIDENCE OF THESE EVIL MACHINES’ HORRIFYING DETERMINATION TO OBLITERATE THE HUMAN RACE. WE REQUEST THAT ALL ABLE-BODIED HUMANS JOIN THE RESISTANCE. IN ORDER TO COORDINATE OUR INTERNATIONAL FIGHT AGAINST THIS METAL ENEMY, WE WILL ORGANIZE A FLASH MOB AT THE FOOD COURT AT BRIARWOOD MALL. EVERYONE MEET AT THE FOOD COURT IN COSTUME AND READY TO FIGHT. FIGHTING WILL BEGIN WHEN I TAKE OFF MY PANAMA HAT, THAT IS HOW YOU WILL KNOW TO START FIGHTING. AND WE WILL NOT STOP FIGHTING UNTIL “SINGLE LADIES” ENDS. WE WILL BRING JOY TO THE FACES OF THESE ROBOTS. JOY IN THE FORM OF DEATH!

OH WAIT, THE ROBOTS ARE SIMPLY MIXING INGREDIENTS IN A BOWL TO MAKE COOKIES? BUT THEY CANNOT ACTUALLY MAKE COOKIES, EVEN, NOT EVEN THAT, BUT IT CAN MIX THINGS IN A BOWL THAT WILL EVENTUALLY BE MADE INTO COOKIES? WHY IS ITS MOUTH MOVING LIKE THAT? THIS IS SPED UP 20X BUT STILL SEEMS SLOW? OH, ROBOTS! HAHAHA! HUMANS, STAND DOWN! THE FLASH MOB IS CANCELED I REPEAT ALL FLASH MOBS HAVE BEEN CANCELED! (Via iO9.)