Videogum

Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments

Well, guys, it has been quite an exciting week. A guy licked a shoe on the subway, a senior girl said what everyone was thinking about sophomore girls, and I became Videogum’s new Associate Editor. Whoa! What a week. I wanted to thank you guys for being so nice and welcoming during my first days here. This is a great blogmmunity and I really am very grateful. I hope to be everything you need and deserve in an Associate Editor, and more. Or just about the exact amount. Onward and upward. Clear hearts, powerful eyes, happy faces.

After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, the James Franco Graduation Caption Contest winner, and the Editor’s and Associate Editor’s Choice.

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments

#5 Just Désserts | May 16th Score:67

Now is the time. Now more than ever. Here’s the caveat: He’s the “insightful” Narrator!!!

Posted in: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Summer Series
#4 R2D2, Esq. | May 17th Score:69

James Franco mingles with the soon-to-be-poor.

Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: James Franco Graduation
#3

Chris Trash | May 16th Score:70

I nominate this once again. This is the atheist version of a chick tract disguised as a high concept movie.

I would also like to add this movie to my nominations:

It’s just simply the worst job done by a major director I have ever seen. It’s kind of hard to make a comedy/action movie that makes sense as a whole. I liked Date Night, The Good Guys and Pineapple Express, but those movies are very uneven. This on the other hand is just a bad movie all the way through. It feels like a band that is jamming for the first time and they are all playing a different song.

-Professor Metaphors

Posted in: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Summer Series
#2 That One | May 16th Score:77

Can we talk about the word “pretentious” for a second? When did it become such a common insult. It seems whenever a movie or book or record gets really ambitious while taking itself seriously, it gets labeled as pretentious. Why? That’s not a real critique.

Is Magnolia pretentious because it attempts to tell the very small stories of multiple characters and paint it on a very large canvas in order to find the universal in the personal? Sure, it’s not perfect but it’s trying something and that alone wins me over.

Movies no one has ever called pretentious:

Transformers

Cop Out

Final Destination 4

All About Steve

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li

Wild Hogs

Old Dogs

Even if the film is terrible, I’ll usually take “pretentious” over “completely fucking empty”.

Posted in: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Summer Series
#1 That One | May 16th Score:120

“Something something 90 minutes of Ryan Reynolds in MY box.”

- thisismynightmare

Posted in: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Summer Series

[Assoc. Ed. Note: Congratulations on the #1 and #2 spots, That One. And congratulations also on your dead-on impression of thisismynightmare.]

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

#1 Polythene Pam | May 13th Score:-44
Upvotes?? You people suck at this.
Posted in: Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments

[Assoc. Ed. Note: Booooo! I guess?]

This Week’s Caption Contest Winner

R2D2, Esq. | May 17th Score:69

James Franco mingles with the soon-to-be-poor.

Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: James Franco Graduation

[Ed. Note: Congratulations, R2D2, Esq. You earned it!]

This Week’s Associate Editor’s Choice

huckabeast | May 18th Score:59

You’re new, Kelly, so here’s a few pointers. I’m sort of the Don Draper of Videogum – that’s just something that everyone knows and accepts and believes to be totally true. Also, I get Editor’s Choice every week. Gabe forgets sometimes, so just remind him. That’s about it, really.

Posted in: Please Help Us Welcome Videogum’s New Associate Editor: Kelly Conaboy

[Assoc. Ed. Note: Did I do it right?]

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

Superglue | 10:46am Score:17

The movie they make of this girl’s life is going to be called Teen BITCH, probably.

Posted in: An Important Message To Sophomores About Prom

[Ed. Note: It’s not nice to be mean to children, but first of all, that child was being mean first, and second of all, this is just a Teen Witch reference. Even Superglue added a secondary comment explaining where he/she was coming from, so let’s just have fun with it.]