Donald Trump Secures The Powerful Joey Lawrence Endorsement

“Whoa!” (Get it?) Mikhail Gorbachev better call Barack Obama on the red phone (I know how stuff works) and tell him it’s a wrap, because real presidential candidate who is definitely running for president and it is not a lazy half-hearted publicity stunt, Donald Trump, just secured another powerful endorsement: Joey Lawrence. Of course, it’s rare for Mr. Lawrence to break his LEGENDARY silence so early in the race, but in a recent interview with FOX News (via Dlisted) he couldn’t remain silent any longer about how much he loves that fucking racist Donald Trump:

I think Donald is an interesting character. He’s an amazing CEO, this is a business. This is a business, running this country is a business and it has not been run the last decade the right way, whether it’s Republican or Democrat, so it’s not really a party issue, it’s more of a person issue. Somebody has to get in there and really hold people accountable.

“This is a business.” It’s probably safe to just assume that Joey Lawrence is a civics teacher, right? Look, I am totally open to anyone who wants to argue that their concerns about the direction the country is heading in are not a party issue and have to do with what they believe to be the general welfare and future prosperity of this country, but they can’t make that argument in a loose-knit endorsement of DONALD TRUMP. “It is weird that Joey Lawrence doesn’t seem to have particularly convincing or well-informed political opinions,” said a person I just made up who represents no one. Seriously, though, between this and Trump’s backing of the powerful Gary Busey Lobby, he is a shoe-in for Most Blatantly Racist Garbage Non-Candidate for President in the 2012 Race So Far! It is really heating up!