It Is 2011 And Victoria Jackson Is (Still) A Coconut

It has been two years since we heard from Saturday Night Live alumnus Victoria Jackson. If you will recall the last time she blipped up, it was to spout some neo-con whatever on Fox News (the clip has since been taken down because her truth was TOO real, probably). Since then, she probably relaxed a little bit, read a couple of books, and at the very least figured out a way to back up some of her conservative rhetoric with actual facts and well-reasoned philosophical arguments that a person who might disagree with her politically could at least respect the work she was doing to state and defend her case, right?

Oh, nope, she’s just writing nutso racist-homophobic blogs about Islam and Glee (?!) on her website! Haha. Neat website! Hold on, I’ve got to make it my default homepage OK done. I’m not sure which is my favorite excerpt from this recent entry. It’s definitely either the introduction, which reads: “Frankly, I’m afraid to say anything about Muslims. Why? Because they kill people,” or this completely BONKERS claim: “The Muslims want to tear down the Statue of Liberty!” That sentence, incidentally, is just linked to a different crazy blog that says this is a real thing. It’s called logic and it is airtight.

And now, Victoria Jackson has been brought onto CNN to defend some of her more controversial views, if you can call barely stringing together three words at a time and just shrugging and looking confused a lot “defending.”

Oof. It would just be sad if it wasn’t so hateful (although it’s still kind of sad). I mean, the lady brought PROPS with her to the News Place. I do love the tried and true argument that conservative Christians need to stop being scared of standing up for what they believe in. Uh, is that a thing? Because I really get the impression that that’s almost the only thing they AREN’T afraid of. Gays, Jews, Muslims, Blacks, Women, Teenagers, the French, Sex, and Education: all terrifying. Saying whatever the fuck creepy hate speech pops into your head at any given moment: not a problem.

Oh, Victoria Jackson. You mean old coconut. Follow Chris Kattan on Twitter! (Thanks for the tip, Alex, Brittany, and D’Anne.)