At this point, it’s kind of a worn-out construction to say that you wish that you cared half as much about something in your life as someone in a YouTube video who cares too much. For one thing, it’s a lie. It aims to paint whoever says it as a miserable husk of a human being while the truth of the matter is that miserable husks of human beings don’t TALK ABOUT IT VERY MUCH. They mostly sit silently on a cat-hair-covered easy chair that smells like underwear and drink alcohol from a novelty glass in the shape of a boot from a revolving restaurant on top of a skyscraper that they ate at on a vacation they took to Dallas 20 years ago. But it is true that there is something ineffable and jealous-making about people expressing unbridled joy. We are all so clever and cool headed, we know that showing emotion is for NERDS. Cool kids are like “I would smile but then the cigarette that is dangling in the corner of my mouth would fall into the coffee that I take black.” But it’s not so much that I’m jealous of the people in this video (an amazing five-minute montage of all the audience reactions at Oprah’s 2010 “Favorite Things” episode) for having the ability to access an enthusiasm that I haven’t experienced in years or maybe ever. I’m jealous of the people in this video FOR GETTING TO GO TO OPRAH’S “FAVORITE THINGS” EPISODE. Are you kidding? That shit is bananas. MY HEAD WOULD FUCKING FALL OFF IF ONLY.
Haha. Man. They’re right, you know. Insane batshit lunatic maniacs who need medicine probably and a brain rag to sop up their melted brains, but correct. (Via InternetToday.)