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Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments

Oh, here we go. It has been revealed that Mel Gibson was required by the LAPD to surrender MULTIPLE guns, which I guess is standard procedure in any case involving accusations of domestic violence. Here is a list of what Mel Gibson was required to turn into the police:

  • A blue steel, semi-automatic 9 millimeter Glock handgun
  • A blue steel, semi-automatic 9 millimeter Beretta handgun
  • A blue steel, semi-automatic 12 gauge Benelli shotgun
  • A blue steel, lever action Winchester rifle
  • A magazine for the Glock
  • A magazine for the Beretta
  • A speed loader for the Glock — which allows someone to load the gun quicker

Yikes. PLEASE STAY SAFE OUT THERE, YOU GUYS.

After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, the winner of this week’s Tanner Family Reunion Caption Contest, and the Editor’s Choice:

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments

#5 lizzing | Nov 10th Score:101

Paul Blart: Mall Cop

Posted in: Best New Party Game 37: #BoringMovies
#4 Patrick M | Nov 8th Score:102

WHY DO YOU THINK THE NOVEL IT WAS BASED ON WAS CALLED “PUSH”

Posted in: Operation Watch This: Bestie x Bestie: What’s Retarded?
#3 Patrick M | Nov 10th Score:103

“That was when I carried you, OBVIOUSLY.” – Jesus

Posted in: We Should All Be So Lucky As To Find Something In This World That Makes Us Happy: Yikes
#2 hotspur | Nov 8th Score:103

Alright, you two, get a staircase.

Posted in: The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: A History Of Violence
#1 paperstreetsoap | Nov 9th Score:133

Does he let her finish?

Posted in: NSFW: A Porno Based On Kanye West And Taylor Swift

[Ed. note: Well done, everyone. Another week of killing it ON THE BOOKS. Stamped. Filed. Herstory.]

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

#1 gatheraroundtheoakentable | Nov 10th Score:-30
I want to see more footage of the bitch in the video. She has a nice butt.
Posted in: That’s Your Boyfriend: The “My Fucking Bush” Guy

[Ed. note: Hahaha. This is such a terrible comment, that I think it might actually be a great comment? GatherAroundTheOakenTable should submit this to season 2 of Bravo’s Work of Art, see what the judges think.]

This Week’s Caption Contest Winner

Patrick M | Nov 9th Score:93

“I’m on it.” – Vivid founder and co-chairman Steven Hirsch

Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Tanner Family Reunion

[Ed. note: Congratulations, Patrick. You earned it!]

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

[Ed. note: This week’s Editor’s Choice goes to my mom, who sent me the following email in response to the Girls Tripping Over Hurdles In Slow Motion To A Radiohead Song, republished here in its entirety:

wow! what a painful viewing. she should try out for swimming. actually, all the girls in that video should be swimming. what a mess! xomom

Haha. She should try out for swimming. ALL THE GIRLS IN THAT VIDEO SHOULD BE SWIMMING! Congratulations, mom. You earned it!]