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Sex Advice From The Double Rainbow Guy

Nerve.com asked the Double Rainbow Guy to provide its readers with some sex advice as part of their on-going series of celebrity guest sex advisers, and as you can see, he’s very very good at giving you advice about sex:

Q: What do you think about having sex outdoors? What would sex under a double rainbow be like?
A: I think it would be amazing! I’ve never done it, but I think it would be incredible. I probably could do it, because I find them a lot. I go to places with waterfalls and stuff — but I usually go alone. I hadn’t thought of it, but now that you bring it up, I think I’m going to try it. I could probably make that happen.

Q: Yes, you need to have sex under a double rainbow and tell us what it’s like.
A: Yeah, that’s a good idea. I think now that you put it into my head I’m actually going to do that.

Haha. Wait a second! Double Rainbow Guy, you’re supposed to be GIVING sex advice, not RECEIVING sex advice. Oh brother. It’s so weird how the Double Rainbow Guy is not ENTIRELY CLEAR on how to give sex advice. So weird. Almost too weird, really.

To be fair, its not entirely his fault. Like, another question he is asked is “I read that you use cage fighting as a way to exercise. Can you tell me a little bit about that? Do you still do that?” I’m not a professional sex adviceologist, but I am pretty sure that is not a question about a sex or dating-related problem. (Or is it? Perhaps I am doing sex wrong!)

Double Rainbow Guy gives it his all, though, as Double Rainbow Guy does with everything. My favorite response (question NOT important) is probably: “Well, you know, I tie my beard up into braids, so, you know, maybe that’s one thing he can do.” Haha. Gross yikes yuck yikes. BE SAFE OUT THERE, YOU GUYS. PUT ON TWO CONDOMS SOMETIMES, JUST IN CASE. (Via BuzzFeed.)