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Relax, Dale Peterson

Whoa, Dale Peterson, RELAX. I am sure that you are a hard-working, decent man who loves his country, and wants to do the best he can for the state of Albama. But just as someone seeing it from the outside, you know, with a fresh pair of eyes not clouded over by the fog of political campaigning, you are coming off like a REAL ASSHOLE. I’m just saying! Admittedly, I don’t even know what an Agriculture Commissioner does, but I’m willing to guess that he doesn’t SHOOT EVERYONE IN THE FACE. And I’m also pretty sure that the reason I don’t know what an Agriculture Commissioner does is because an Agriculture Commissioner is a mid-level beaurocrat in local government, and I don’t know what any of those people do, not because of THUGS AND CRIMINALS. Huh? Seriously, just relax. You’ll name names? You need to relax relaxes.

Incidentally, the best part of this ad is how the Related Videos column on YouTube is just trailers for Mel Gibson’s The Patriot. Right. (Thanks for the tip, Gideon.)