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Hey, What’s Up With Topher Grace?

In this feature, we will periodically check in to see what is up with Topher Grace.

I don’t know if any of you have ever raised a mascot before, but it is incredibly time consuming! They’re always struggling to learn their routines and getting poop all over their costumes. I grew up with mascots, but I’ve never raised a mascot of my own, so this is a real learning experience for us both. But mostly for her, let’s be honest. I mean, I’ve been to college, OK? That’s right, college. What has she been to? Her mom’s belly. That’s about it. If you asked her to submit a resume for your job opening, at the top it would say Objectives: To not die. And under experience it says: “Being Born. Representing a mid-sized pop-culture website at all major blogging events.” She doesn’t even know Excel! It’s ridiculous. I doubt if she could even get a job working at McDonald’s, and McDonald’s IS NOT THAT HARD OF A PLACE TO GET A JOB AT, NO OFFENSE. Of course, that’s beside the point, because she was born to be a mascot. A mascot and a TRUE WONDERFUL FRIEND.

Speaking of living things that require a fair amount of time and attention, what is up with Topher Grace?

This week, we go deep into T-Doz’s love life, although not so far that we invade his privacy!

The website “Who Should Date?” asks the question: “Who Should Topher Grace Date?” Leighton Meester currently holds 80 percent of the vote, with Jinnifer Goodwin coming in a far second at 20 percent, although there are literally dozens of potential women for us to choose for Topher to choose, including Snooki, Holly Madison, and Kristin Davis. Personally, I would like Topher to date someone based on personal compatibility, not some Internet poll!!!!!

Similarly, the website “Who’s Dated Who” proves with scientific reliability that Topher Grace and Lauren Conrad are sexually separated by only four degrees!

Whoa, you cannot argue with science! Way to go, Topher Grace! (Thanks for the tip, gumlover42.)

Of course, Topher Grace is still playing the field, as many young men and women in Hollywood and even other cities enjoy doing before settling down, and so this blog post titled “Topher Grace Married” seems like a desperate attempt to snag some web traffic from Topher fans. That being said, it is definitely worth a look, because I think it was written by a space alien!

But perhaps the most important news this week: the Valentine’s Day DVD, which will be released on May 18, is now available for pre-order here!

Not sure what the special features are yet, but I’m sure they will be very special.

And, of course, That ’70s Show remains popular in syndication.

There you go. That is what is up with Topher Grace. Send your Topher tips to[email protected]. See you next time!