When WOULD Anyone Like Gwyneth Paltrow?

Videogum reader Mickey sends in this photo of the Daily Telegraph’s front page section teaser. For those of you who do not have JPG capabilities on your WebTVs, it reads “Paltrow Pique: You Wouldn’t Like Me When I’m Angry” and it features a photograph of Gwyneth Paltrow making her “I-find-the-petite-bourgeoisie-amusing” face. And she has a point. I wouldn’t like her when she’s angry. Here are some other times that I wouldn’t like her:

  • When she is happy
  • When she is sleepy
  • When she is wearing the same outfit as me at the party
  • When she is sitting next to me on the shuttle bus between the baggage claim and the Enterprise car rental
  • When she is cutting me in line at the Pinkberry and then only orders a free sample
  • When she breaks into a Sea World at night and tries to steal one of the whales to keep in her hot tub
  • When she interrupts a keynote speaker at a Global Poverty Summit to ask directions to the Chanel Outlet
  • When she is the subject of a science experiment that goes totally wrong and renders her body into “pure energy”
  • When she is not angry

The list goes on. And on and on. And on and on and on and on and on.